I just thought I would share this with you.

I went by the in-laws this weekend. We talked about our plans for Easter sunday. My mother-in-law was upset that I was on a diet. She seems to see it as an inconveniece to her. She is the kind of person that loves to prepare large meals. She is an excellent cook and baker. I have often joked that I married her daughter for her pies. She is not what I would call overweight. She was not upset about the Atkins part. Some people are. She was just upset that it would (in her view) inconenience her. I explained to her that I would eat meat and green bean. She asked about deviled eggs. I thought about it, yeah I can eat those.

Have you guys had any similiar reactions?

Yes, yes, yes. I still cringe when I hear ,"Are you still on that diet?" My family is Italian so you can imagine the reactions when I turn down the pasta. My grandma used to think thin was anyone slightly smaller than Orson Welles.

BUT! Eventually my family (and your's too, I hope) has come to accept my woe, if not fully understand it. My mother is diabetic so she came around a little quicker than the rest.

Are you having a pot luck? Perhaps this is your opportunity to show them how well you can eat. Browse the recipe collection and whip something up to take to Easter dinner.

Good luck!

I have had similar responses from my immediate family too...they seem to take it personally if you are not going to eat their food. Kinda like their food is unhealthy....and for the most part it is not a good choice for us right now. My standard response is that I am choosing to get healthy right now and unfortunately I can not eat some of the wonderful foods you make. I can eat some of the food you are serving and I am very happy about that....

Have a great Easter!!!!

Never thought of it that way, but that would be a slap in the face "I'm eating healthier now" does imply that the folks are eating UNhealthy! While we all know this may be true, it will produce defensive responses, nonetheless. I prefer to tell people that certain foods just "don't agree" with me. We can all relate to that. Then the blame is on the food, not the cook!

I took the 'I'm allergic to that' route. Some people are food pushers and that is the best way for me to keep them from 'forcing' stuff on me I don't want.

Maybe your wife could intervene and re-inforce to her mother that she should cook everything as usual and that you will make your own choices.

Some people act as if we will starve to death if we don't eat a complete meal. Not like I can't go home in a few hours and get what I want!

While I'm sure that nobody wants to insult their hostess/mother/MIL/wife, the fact is that at least in America, holidays are used primarily as an excuse to pig out on all the foods that most people wouldn't normally eat and yes, many of them are not exactly healthy for us by any standard being that they are usually both high carb/sugar AND high fat. I know in my family that foods typically served for holidays couldn't be called health food by any stretch of the imagination (come on, now...when was the last time you heard anyone claim that pies, cakes, cookies and candy were actually good for you?). How about those sweet potatoes drenched in butter or margarine and maple syrup with marshmallows on top? A good example of taking something that's good for you and making it not good for you. Green bean casserole? Well...at least the green beans are good for you, but then they add condensed cream soup (starch, sugar and hydrogenated fat) and those carby french fried onion thingies once again taking something that starts out healthy and making it unhealthy by either low fat OR low carb standards.
Assuming that you are not the only family member who will be partaking of the foods being prepared, I find it difficult to understand why anyone would be put out by your chosing not to eat the carbier items (unless, of course ALL the foods fit that category and they feel that they must prepare an extra dish just for you!). If they are, how about offering to bring a veggie side dish that you can eat along with the meat dish being served and perhaps a low carb dessert. I've served low carb desserts to guests before and they never knew that what they were eating was sugar free and low carb and raved about how good it was.
OTOH...you can go and eat everything they prepare without comment and then get back to low carbing again with your next meal. I guess it all depends on how much you want to stick with your chosen plan and whether or not you think you can get right back on track again after a high carb meal.

When I started Atkins you would have thought by the reaction from my family that I was planning suicide. My Mother thinks that the Atkins plan kills people. Well I'm not dead and am the healthiest I've been in years. I do all the cooking here. So my family gets subjected to wonderful tasy dinners. I still cook rice and pasta for them so they hardly notice the difference.

you guys are great!
I am glad to hear I am not alone
it makes it a bit tougher because my wife is not on the diet.
when she went on a trip with her parents for a week I threw her cookies away!!

Lisa - I think people have legitimate reasons to feel put out when one refuses the sweet potatoes/cakes/etc. The whole point of holiday feasts is just that - to feast. It is a celebration, a moment to be enjoyed and those moments are full of tradition. This is why most families eat the same meals (Grandma's pecan pie), the recipes that have been passed down for generations. I don't personally equate a feast with pigging out. I can (and do) help myself to a variety of good things but it is not necessary to take ten platefuls. Again, the point is to celebrate, to enjoy good fortune and the abundance of friends and family. Of course, this can be done over a turkey drumstick or a slice of pie. It is up to those of us who "know better" to make the choices we need to make while respecting the choices and traditions of others.

Just take what you can eat, and go ahead talking and celebrating... If they try to push food on you, just use one of those handy excuses listed in the other responses. I find that the less I advertise, the less trouble I get into. People know that sweets, etc, aren't really good for you, after all.

Lisa N said........



Very good advice!

In defense of the MIL, I have hosted numerous family dinners and it can be very stressful and difficult to plan and prepare when several people are on several different diets.

Bring enough of your own food to share and have a good time and a Happy Easter.
asugar

Iowagirl...

I can see your point if the original poster was the one doing the cooking and refusing to prepare the traditional fare for the holiday and instead was subjecting all the guests to low carb or if they were insisting that the host or hostess accomodate their need for low carb food (which I don't see in the original post). It seems to me that she was put out because of her perception/belief that someone shouldn't be on a diet during a holiday.



I agree that's true and feasting once or twice a year isn't likely to make you fat, although I can think of at least 8 holidays where feasting is the traditional way to celebrate plus the birthdays of family members and anniversaries so those feast days can easily work out to about once a month instead of only a few times a year. However...for many people, just one meal of high carb can set them back a couple of weeks on weight loss and make it very difficult for them to get back on track again afterwards due to old addictions/cravings being reactivated. For some there is no such thing as high carb in moderation. OTOH..there are many people that can deviate from low carb for one meal for a special occasion and get right back on track again without a problem. I think it's important to know what you personally can handle and base your decision on whether to stay low carb for a holiday or not on that.
As a hostess, I try to consider the needs/tastes of my guests when preparing my menu and accomodate them whenever possible (yes, I do ask if there are things they can't eat or don't like), not my need to cook certain foods because it's tradition. If my guests lean towards high carb/low fat, I'm happy to cook that way, although I'm likely to pass on the higher carb dishes myself, there are ways to make everyone happy. Maybe my understanding of being a hostess is wrong or old fashioned, but I've always felt that it was more about making my guests feel comfortable and welcome than it was about me showing off my cooking skills and I personally wouldn't be offended at all if someone chose not to eat a particular part of a meal that I had prepared because of some dietary restriction or even a personal dislike.