I used to be so ashamed
I went to the doctor and complained.. a lot. I hurt so much, and they ran a full battery of tests looking for HIV, Lupus, SLE, rheumatoid arthritis, all different types of arthritis, etc. I contracted Scarletina (Scarlet fever) twice within a few months of each other. (Incidentally, I just contracted Scarletina again just this week.)
I had swollen aching joints, like my thumb. It would swell, become red and tender, and the next day it would be another joint. She mashed all the "tender points", and they all hurt. I payed cash for these tests because I was so desperate to find some pain relief. Over 700 dollars on these tests!
I was 165 lbs at 5'7", and wearing a size 8/10. I worked out religously 6 days a week weight lifting and doing yoga. I was almost solid muscle, eating no more than 7 grams of fat per day, always under 1,200 calories. I took lactic acid for the burn before workouts, carefully measuring and weighing all my food and writing down every bite, every drink and tabulating my daily totals. I would carbo load before a hard workout, then return to the low fat diet.
"Fibrositis" (fibromyalgia), she said, "though your thyroid is on the low end of normal, but that's fine." She offered no assistance, no relief, "You just have to live with it."
And I did. I would get up in the morning, begrudgingly dreading the first few steps out of the bed. I could not stand up straight at first, nor could I place my feet flat on the floor. I limped bent kneed to the bathroom.
Minor chores and daily living became difficult. Just brushing my hair took exhaustive effort. (I have waist length hair) I could no longer stand to cook a meal. To this day, I have to sit on a stool to cook and do dishes, though I find myself standing a lot more. I could not grocery shop, nor take care of my pool or my yard any longer.
I wept to see my strong lean body melt away into a jiggling, pain ridden lump. I had pitting edema and no known cause, they just constantly fed me lasix, up to 60 mg per day. I became plagued with frequent gallbladder attacks, being told I had "food poisoning" or "intestinal flu." I even called the health department on a restaurant after being told they gave me bad food!
Ok, so I go on and ask a couple people about it
"That's just a diagnosis they give you when they can't find out whats really wrong."
"Thats just a diagnosis they give you when they think you are a hypocondriac. It makes you feel better to have *some* diagnosis."
I was *so* ashamed, and felt helpless.
That was more than 10 years ago. For 6 months last year (2002) I couldn't walk when I awoke, it took about an hour for me to be able to put my feet flat on the floor and to have a normal gait.
I slept 16 hours a day and could only stay awake for 4 hours at a time. I became addicted to caffiene, because it was the only way I could hold down a job. (Which is supposed to actually make the condition worse.)
I have actually lost some feeling in my left leg after it tingled and went numb over a peroid of several months.
I started Atkins, taking Centrum, and calcium January 4th, 2003.
3 Weeks into it, a little light bulb goes off above my head. The pain.. is almost totally GONE!
I had gone upstairs to get something, and it wasn't till I came downstairs I realized! OMG, I just went up the stairs and didn't hurt! I no longer have to live on the bottom floor, sleeping on the sofa because I can't climb the stairs to get to the bedroom.
Not sure if it was the supplements, or the diet, or perhaps both, but it is amazing!
I have occasional small pains, but after learning "to live with it",
I am now not buying Tylenol and Advil in bulk, huge bottles, in fact, I haven't needed it since about a week after I started the diet.
Not sure what it all means, but who cares? Whatever I am doing, it has to be right!
~Fantasia
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