Hi,

I've been studying LC eating for several years, incorporated some of the principles into my diet, but was terrified to give up the chocolate. I'd literally have panic attacks if I didn't eat Hershey bars or make brownies or have some kind of chocolate. I weighed 292 last month at the doctor's office, am 5'8", and have been this heavy for over a decade. My goal is 150 lbs. In college I weighed 135, but after 7 kids I figure that's not reasonable to shoot for.

When I was a kid and all the way through to my first year in college I could eat anything at all. I was so active that I stayed skinny, even dropping to 127 lbs during my Sophomore year in HS due to being on the swim team and swimming 2 1/2 hours a day. I took a lot of pride in that, too, not realizing AT ALL the terrible battle of being overweight. I remember seeing men (I had issues with men, anyway, back then, so....) who must have weighed 350-400 lbs sitting in a restuarant eating and I was so judgemental and condemning it was sickening. I had no compassion, no empathy, no understanding whatsoever. Well, that all changed when I got married, got a desk job, and my thyroid went haywire. Then I got pregnant, too, gained about 60 lbs., had severe clinical depression for several years, got pregnant again, was finally diagnosed with hypothyroidism, and had 4 children in 4 1/2 years. By then I weighed about 270 lbs, was eating a pan of brownies a day just to self-medicate the self-hatred, depression and constant anxiety I was going through. It didn't take long to gain up into the 290's, but at that point I leveled out. I just couldn't bear the thought of that 300 coming up on the scale, but if the numbers dropped below 290 I panicked and ate to gain it back.

I'm a classic emotional eater, and my issues with food have been merely a symptom of other core emotional issues that I've been addressing ever since. I wanted to be happy -- that's been my goal in life. Not just cope. I want happiness! I found a good mainstream therapist who helped me A LOT after my first 4 children were born. I stabilized at that point emotionally along with my weight, but never quite reached a point where I felt safe losing weight. I was happy, though. Happiest than I'd ever been in my life. My marriage was good, the kids were so much fun (once we got out of the diaper stage), and we bought our first house.

When my (then) youngest went to kindergarten I decided to take a class at the community college nearby. I had to swallow my pride and ask for a special desk because I didn't fit in the standard chair & desk combinations the school used in their classrooms. The next day of class I found a special desk and separate chair waiting for me in the back of the room. It had a HUGE handicapped symbol stenciled in the upper corner. I was mortified and quickly covered the symbol with my book bag. When did my weight gain become a handicap? I was also desperately ashamed of myself for being ashamed of the handicap label! At times in those days my self-hatred was boundless. I actually wrote an essay for class on that incident -- maybe I'll post it . Really woke me up to a lot of self-deception I was still doing.

I continued to look for methods of healing the inner me, so the outside could follow. I looked into Overeaters Anonymous, and while I recognized the power of the principles they ascribed to, I just wasn't willing to say I'd be an addict for life. I don't believe that, I refuse to accept that, and choose instead to believe in the power to heal, completely, 100%, including this addiction to carbs. I *know* my eating is not just physical, not just biological, and not just an illness. I'm very much aware of the frustration, anger, fear, and/or the desire to feel loved, or fear that I'm not loved, that I have when I reach for the food.

So, I kept looking and about a year ago I found meridian therapies. First I tried Rapid Eye Technology therapy (it is more of a metaphoric therapy, not a meridian therapy), which was effective, but I had to keep going back. I wanted something I could do at home.

During that time I attended a seminar by an RET therapist, Carol Tuttle. She also did a lot of energy work, something I was *not* comfortable with at all -- too New Age, too weird, to 'woo-woo'.** RET had already been a stretch, but I knew that there were studies on Rapid Eye Movement, so I was willing to open up to it. During the seminar Tuttle also demonstrated this one technique called EFT that was too easy and too simple and looked like a parlor trick. I didn't believe it had any effect at all on the guy who volunteered for the demonstration. The demonstration lasted about 5 minutes, tops. I forgot it ever happened for about 6 months.

Then one day in desperation I prayed to God for help to cure this food addiction, and into my mind came that demonstration and the feeling of being urged to study it further. I remembered that Tuttle had said she had a link to the EFT on her website, so I went, began reading, downloaded the training manual, tried it out and just like that, my chocolate craving was gone. I was totally shocked. All I did was tap on a few meridian points, like accupressure -- which I had seen on the Discovery Channel and which western science has studied and proven to be effective with phobias and other things -- and state an affirmation while I was tapping. It was a little bizarre, something I didn't want to do in public, but dang! It worked! I didn't realize at first that it worked. I'd tapped one "round" and then my preschoolers ran in and needed me, so I put the manual down and took care of them. Four hours later my son Mark asked me if I was still going to the store. It was like a bolt of lightening. I had completely FORGOTTEN about the overwhelming need I'd been feeling to get to the store and get some chocolate that I had tapped on with the EFT. Not only had I forgotten all about it, I *still* didn't want to go! I didn't CARE if I had chocolate or not. I became a believer after that.

I started studying and using EFT daily on every aspect of my chocolate and junk food cravings. Pretty soon I was also using it to address a childhood (which took care of my issues with men, also) and other past traumas big and small. I've finally reached a point now where I'm no longer afraid to lose weight. Something finally clicked for me last Friday night, and I suddenly knew I could do it. In fact, I'm excited, and can hardly wait.

So here I am, having studied LC, and finally ready, really ready, to put it into practice. I only want to do it once, and never have to lose this weight twice, which is why I did so much work on the emotional issues first! And now, as more issues come up as the weight comes off, I have a simple tool to balance those like LCing will balance my hormones.

That's my journey to get to this point. I'm now 38, still happily married (having lived through all that with me, it's obvious my husband's a saint), with 7 kids (the first four are ages 17, 15, 14, and 13. The last three are ages 4 1/2, 3 and 3 {yes, twins}). I'm really thrilled to be here at the Triple-Digit Club.

Thanks for listening if you got this far. If you are curious about EFT you can check it out at http://www.emofree.com . It is free to download the beginner's manual, and there are hundreds of case-histories of its successful use in everything from pain and illness to weight loss and phobias that can also be read for free. It's cool. I've been amazed.

**I have to say over the last few years I've become fascinated with energy medicine. I have too many friends who have benefited from various healing modalities to be a skeptic anymore.

evergreen

Hi there!

Welcome to the forum and to low-carbing - it does work! I can certainly understand many of your perspectives. I was always slender as a teenager and started gaining weight in my mid-twenties. I know that I was uncomfortable with issues related to men and sexuality and all that attention as a teen was not comfortable. I belonged to OA when I was younger and it helped me enormously. I never lost weight, but I learned to live life to the fullest even with the weight. My career took off, my kids grew up, and I had fabulous clothes even though I was larger.

At 47, this is much harder and I find it harder to lose as well. The health issues start to come up that are related to weight whereas when we are younger we rather get away with it and think we always will.

I hope you will start a journal and keep track of your trip through low-carbing. It is an enormous help to me.

Wow 7 kids! I am the eldest of 7 and I do not know how my parents lived through us growing up. There was one year when we were all teenagers. I watched my parents turn gray overnight.

Orchid

Hi and Welcome!

I too was thin and active all through high school and college ..was even a cheerleader in both...but alas, got married/pregnant and gained 60 lbs!!
Never lost that, and continued to gain more ...How do we get from there to here?? All I know is that what ever effort it takes, it will be worth it, to get back a healthy life.

So glad you are with us

Weave

Welcome evergreen souds like you are a weel read and thought out lady. This should work for you fast.

Welcome evergreen! With such a solid background, you should be at the top of the losers class soon!

Evergreen,

Welcome to the forum! I read your story with great interest, and you are an example for everyone of perseverence and desire. I know that you will be successful.

I too was once a big skeptic of energy medicine - but I completely believe in it now after it changed my son's life. I have studied it quite extensively also, and would love to exchange ideas and information with you - thanks for the link, I haven't studied this particular branch of energy medicine yet.

One of the best ways I have heard energy medicine explained is this - pretend you are living in a tribe in the middle of Africa somewhere and have never seen anyone from the west. You are laying in bed one day with a fever and a headache. I come walking into your village, see your condition, and give you a little white disc and ask you to swallow it because it will break your fever and make your headache go away. What would your reaction be? You would think it was crazy because aspirin isn't part of your culture. Sometimes we think the same way about energy medicine because it isn't part of our culture - but it has been part of Asian cultures for hundreds of years - and they are some of the healthiest people on earth.

Just thought you might enjoy that.

Evergreen...Welcome and thank you for your honest and candid post. Many here will relate to things you have said and learn from them. I'm glad you have decided to join us here in the TDC and I'm looking forward to getting to know you better! Good luck on your new journey!

Hi Evergreen!

I actually was seeing a therapist last year who was trained in EFT, we were doing that a lot in our sessions. Have to say it didn't do alot for me though. I had some successes, small, temporary ones, but nothing that seemed to stick. I don't discount the idea though, I kind of like that new age type stuff.

Welcome to our group. With strategies like EFT to help you out, I'm sure you'll have great success as a low-carber!

Valerie

Hi Evergreen

I can identify with a lot of what you've said. I have issues with society...men, mainly. I'm finally coming around to the point that it's not worth it to make myself unhappy and to keep the weight in order to keep some people away.
I've always been one of those "woo woo" people...hehehe. You made me laugh when I read that part! I've come across that thought pattern quite alot. It's nice to see more "new agey" ideas entering the mainstream. Maybe we won't all be seen as flakes in the future! hehehe
Good luck!
Melaney

Orchidday -- I hear you on those health issues. I have a few too. It has finally dawned on me (or hit me with a 2 x 4) that I'm not getting away with it any longer.... it is pay the piper time.

OA is a wonderful organization, I'm not knocking it! The 12 steps are awesome. Addiction runs in my family, especially alcoholism, so I am intensely grateful for the anonymous groups. Several of my extended family members wouldn't be here without them! I've known people who have been healed of their addictions, is all, so I know it's possible. Those I've seen this with have gotten there through various energy work modalities, or through their reliance on God. I want to be one of them. I'm not there yet, but I am not giving up. LCing is a part of that healing.... I *have* to stay away from the sugar and chocolate to make the no-cravings stick. Cravings and addictions are so complex, that getting rid of an initial craving isn't enough. I was craving-free for a month, lost 10 lbs without exercising, but started having panick attacks. There are so many issues surrounding emotional eating, and so many physiological ones surrounding eating carbs, that each one has to be dealt with, and it takes a long time, even for something as fast and easy as EFT has been for me.

Turned out that my panic attacks were caused by a hormonal imbalance -- I was taking thyroid medication for hypothyroidism, but the dosage was way too low. Once the doctor raised the dosage, the panic attacks went away. But by then the cravings were all back because I had gone back to eating chocolate to self-medicate for the panic attacks! Alcoholics can't go back to using alcohol, and food addicts can't go back to using the food they're addicted to! At the time, it was the only thing that was keeping away the panic attacks. The EFT wasn't working on them -- I tried, believe me. But when it's a purely physical thing causing the problem, all the tapping in the world can't fix it. (EFT won't heal a broken leg, but it can help eliminate the fear and trauma that resulted from the event that caused the broken leg!) I haven't consistently used EFT since to get rid of the cravings, because I knew I had to also commit to a low-carb regimen, and I wasn't ready until this past weekend.

It all sounds so crazy, but it's been a very strange year.

I do need to do a journal. Thank you for the suggestion.

Weave--you said, "How do we get from there to here?? All I know is that what ever effort it takes, it will be worth it, to get back a healthy life."

Amen!! How many times I have looked in the mirror and asked, 'How in the WORLD did I GET HERE????' I keep telling myself what you say. It's worth it. It's worth it, and keep remembering all the things I want to do with this fabulous body when it's back in good health.

Memaw05 -- I've read, but I've never put it into practice. My husband says I use the gathering of knowledge as my way to avoid having to DO anything to cause the changes I want in my life. I also use it as a crutch and a means to fend of anxiety about things. AND it's also a blind -- it isn't real. I'm a dabbler. There are very few things I've mastered. I want LCing to be one of them. And I read so many cuz I couldn't bring myself to decide on which one was "best". I have a terrible fear about making wrong decisions. I guess some part of me deep down believes the sky is going to come crashing down on me if I make a mistake, make the wrong choice. Notice in my ID stuff to the left that is says "non-specific" for the LC plan. ;-) Yep, weird. That's me!

But look at YOU!!! You're almost half-way to your goal! WOW. That is sooo cool. Gives me hope!!!


Hummelda -- Wow, you too! Congratulations on your achievement as well -- more than half way there. I've never ever been where you are now. I only ever have gone up. Seeing your success, everyone's really, helps me have faith that I can do it too.

Char -- Thanks! I appreciate the kind welcome so much! I really want to make this a WOL, and am grateful for the support. I've noticed your other posts around the board, and look forward to getting to know you. :-)

Kenkobiz-- love the analogy! That is so true. I am very interested in whatever you've studied, and would love to talk more about it. It is gaining in acceptance, simply because the results, the healing that is taking place just can't be denied. (Much like LCing, come to think of it!) I've read Donna Eden's book, but I'm not even knowledgeable enough to claim to be a novice there. One friend is extremely gifted and uses many of Eden's techniques. We've had some VERY interesting experiences! I would love to take training from her, but it's not an option for me at this point in my life. A couple of my friends do Reiki--which is nice, but not as powerful (In my experience) as other modalities. My favorites are the Meridian Energy therapies and the metaphoric therapies. I want to get certified in EFT so I can safely help people with whatever comes up. At this point, though, I need to focus on getting myself healthy first. Then there will be time and energy to do the EFT training. Right now I'm still a beginner at it. Even beginners can have remarkable success with it, though. I just love it.

How did it change your son's life? wow. Sounds like there's a great story there. :-)

Valerie-- I'm so sorry it didn't work for you! Usually if EFT doesn't work, it's because it has either been used to address an addiction, or when all the issues or aspects of a problem have not been addressed by the practitioner. Then there is the small percentage it just doesn't work on! I would love to know just exactly what the therapist did. It is unusual for it not to make permanent changes with emotional issues if it's applied correctly. There are also physical things that get in the way, though, including food allergies. Were you LCing while you were seeing this therapist? IF you weren't, I wonder if you kept having reversals due to food allergies. I know Gary Craig talks about things like that in his manual. Anyway, you're the first person I've met in a year that it didn't work on! So I'm mighty curious!

Melanie-- ROFL. Maybe I'll see you at the vortexes in Sedona someday! ;-) (My husband and I went there for our anniversary in January. It was so fun. Talk about gorgeous! We live in the Phoenix Valley, so it was an easy place to go to to get away.) It is nice that these ideas are entering the mainstream. Our Far-East neighbors wouldn't have been using all these things for 5000 years if it wasn't effective, eh? EFT was actually used in a study and written up in the Journal of Clinical Psychology last Fall, 2003. It was shown to be very effective in curing phobias, and the results of the treatment were found to be lasting in the follow-up several months later.

I don't know if we'll ever overcome the "flake" label in our lifetime. I've always been more 'spiritual' (woo-woo. A friend of mine calls it that. It makes me laugh, too!) than 'normal', but adding this energy work stuff into it, and, well, suffice it to say I don't talk about it much except with like-minded people. I don't want to alienate old friends. I'll talk about it online, though, without fear. It's easier for a stranger to read it, get curious, look into it and maybe use it or not, without pressure, or even getting out of their safety zone. It's harder for people you work with, live with, or hang around with to take that risk, IMO.

I just love that fact that western science is studying eastern medicine, especially energy meridians, and coming up with 'scientific proof' that there really are energy fields around and in our bodies that affect us on many levels. It is a powerful companion to western medicine, and if they would just get the whole nutrition thing figured out too, then wow! We are going to be a very healthy country.

Well, THAT was a long reply! I've gotten nothing done!!! Better disappear and take care of my family!

Thanks for the warm welcome!
evergreen