...to try and sabotage me? my hunny made ziti last night with meatballs and sausage and chicken the whole bit. he saved the can so i could fitday it if i wanted to have the meats w/ a lil sauce... and insisted he didnt add anything to it, but this morning when i went into the fridge, the parmesean cheeze that was unopened yesturday is 1/2 gone today- i doubt he used 1/2 jar on just his meal grr. my MIL is good for this too. she'll make baked chicken and insist she didnt marinate it or whatever and its so obviously doused in italian dressing. or make veggies and tell me theres nothing in them when i can TASTE the butter & salt. *sigh*

what should i do? i dont wanna out and out call them liers or offend them by not eating it, kwim?

Talk with your husband and MIL--"talk with" not "talk to". Explain how important your WOE is to you and especially to your health. Try to make them understand how just a tiny little ingredient can upset your dietary balance for the day. People who have never had to restrict their eating just don't understand but it may help if you explain what you are doing and why. Good luck and don't let anyone discourage you.

Crystal... are you not eating cheese, salt or butter... i probably would have been more concerned about the sauce than those things.

I am so sorry you are having this problem. I am lucky (and not so lucky) that no one tries to cook for me. I think that if I was faced with this, I would try a few things a) I would speak to them and ask their support and understanding. b) I would try to be patient and understanding. c) If it continued I would simply get up and fix myself a salad or something else to eat. Eventually, they will get the idea.

I think by not eating it, they'll get the picture at how serious you are about weightloss. DH would say...lets go have pizza and I'd give in and go. Then when I got really serious about dieting and he would ask, I would simply say "I can't eat it" and he learned how serious I had become.

(((HUGS))) I hope that your family gets onboard. Its so much harder when you don't have their support....tell them that!

i do eat cheeze & salt & butter- in moderation... its not a regular part of my diet... but that's not the point. i would atleast like to know so i can decide if it's something i want or not, kwim? or fitday it accordingly so i can stay within my calorie & carb & fat counts. they might as well give me regular ice cream and tell me its atkins, yano? maybe i take the whole thing too seriously, but do u have any idea how many carbs are in 2 tablespoons of regular italian dressing? TOO MANY!

devan- i never say i "can't" eat anything. because i dont like feeling restricted. my dh always tells me i cant eat this or that, and i tell him that i CAN, but that i choose not to. he knows i am serious, but feels, i think, that a little of this and that wont "kill" me. generally, he's harder on me than i am on myself, so, why he does this is beyond me- and MIL is supposedly LCing on south beach, so, i don't get her either.

i think i am going to start passing things up at the risk of offending them because they know better. or they should. and i think michelle is right- maybe they will get the picture and cut the crap!

thanks guys

I had that problem with my family and friends for a while... but then I also realized it was a problem I had myself.

I AM restricted. I don't feel like it, sometimes, but I have to remind myself every day that this isn't a diet--this is me saving my life. I'm going to die if I don't turn this around... and that's the long and the short of it.

When someone says, "C'mon, one bite won't kill you," I say, "Actually, it very well could, and I'd rather not take the chance."

i hear ya on that one Bree- but i'm perfectly healthy- aside from being overweight- sure i know my weight could lead to problems in the future but nothing in the immediate, and i could end up being one of those people who smoke and eat whatever they want their whole life and live to be 110. maybe this mindset will be my demise- maybe you're right and i should think more like u and devan- BEFORE its too late. but at the same time, i don't want to feel like im dieting or feel like i'm restricted because i think if i felt like i can never eat a baked potato with bacon and cheeze and chives and butter and sourcream again or i will die, i will get depressed or something and give up. anyways, lots of food for thought. thanks

It's kinda like when you tell people you don't drink (alcohol), boy, everybody is gung ho to get you a beer or wine or a cooler or a girlie drink.

Some people are the same with food, you tell them you're watching your carb intake and Bingo, they're offering you stuff they know damn well is off limits to you or make a point of eating it in front of you if you refuse their offer to try it, that really bugs me...ya sometimes feel like they're testing you and I find that not only annoying but also insulting..."don't my thoughts and wishes count for anything in your eyes" is what I feel like asking them.

oy vei nik. u just gave me a flashback! when i was like 11 or 12 years old, i gave up candy for lent. on day 1 in the evening, my father had a bag of gumdrops and offerred me 1, i took one & ate it- totally forgetting about giving candy up for lent. as soon as i ate it, he laughed at me and tormented me over it and i ran to my room crying i still remember that to this day, although i havent thought about it in a while. it was SO MEAN of him- man- no wonder i have eating complexes. i would HOPE that my DH & MIL were not being maliciously evil like that