I wasn't sure where to post this. I was thinking confessions, but my feelings were really involved...So here goes...I was doing so great on my plan. I was actually down to 154.5 yesterday morning, which is the lowest weight I have been in two years. I am exercising like I love to, and getting alot stronger and things have been great. I should say that I have been doing this since about the middle of feb. (the first time was Aug 2003). Anyways, I have had to put up with my DH eating all kinds of crap around me, taking me to eat out where there aren't many good choices, and all kinds of temptations. I have been very very dedicated. He has attempted to start LC at least 3 other times. Finally, starting this sunday he got serious about it and is doing it. So that is the first of my feelings. I don't know how I feel with him actually sticking to LC and losing weight. For some reason this is upsetting me. Is it because it takes the success focus off of me? He has been very supportive of me and my efforts.
Secondly, I feel very uncomfortable with my weight loss. I am thrilled be at a weight I haven't been in forever, but it makes me feel vulnerable at the same time. (I am working hard to get over this. This is one of those really personal things and I believe stems from my issues with the "before" me that was very attractive. I was in several bad situations with men).
Then, I was also depressed last night for really the first time in three months since I got serious about losing weight, and I just didn't know how to deal. Well, I did know that I should exercise or something, but after exercising in the morning and a 10 hour work day, I probably should just have gone to bed.
Also (and sorry for any men, skip this part), I was feeling very hormonal as TOM is coming...
SOOOOO, I had all of these feelings/issues/whatever upsetting me last night and I thought food would make it better like it used to. Well, I found out things have changed! Nothing tasted that great really, and then I didn't get that old happy feeling that I used to when I would eat the carb foods. Instead, I got more upset and depressed and put on 5 pounds! I realize this is mostly water weight, but still, that upsets you more.
I don't know what my point is in posting this. I guess to just get it off my chest and see if others have similar problems or experiences. I still got up this morning for my exercise and I am having a very low cal day (just not eating much). I have heard all the things to do when you get the urge to cheat (read, exercise, take bath, etc, etc), and usually I do them...its just, what do you do when you feel your world/feelings/whatever is out of control and it just overcomes you???