Looking back on the years when I was an obese teen- I know that I would have been very embarrassed if my mom came up to me and had a "diet" talk. At the age of 16 I know that I probably would have done the exact opposite of anything she recommended. Your child may be different but in general it is impossible to rationalize with teenagers... they lack the ability to think about consequenses like most adults can.

Anyhow, when I was 17 I weighed 198 pounds. By the age of 21- I got down to 140 and I was looking great. At that age I blamed my mom for "letting" me be fat. Even though I was the one eating the junk- I thought that she could have made better food choices when grocery shopping.

With Atkins I think it does not really seem like dieting- not in the sense that we have been taught all of these years... that is why I think you could do low carb in the house and get away with not telling them.

hth

Nora

LOL...they have the ability to think about the consequences, they just think that they don't apply to them . It's experience that teaches us that no, we are not exempt from the same consequences as everyone else who does what we do.

My only concern for just changing everything at home without getting them involved in the decision (and their agreement to participate willingly) is that they may eat low carb/high fat at home, but high carb everywhere else which would be setting them up for some health problems down the road. Even kids are not exempt from the problems that high fat/high carb causes.
Just my nickel's worth...

Hi,

My vote is that you tell your kids what you told us in your first post - it's simple and honest. Just say that you're learning a lot about nutrition now, and that you and their dad want them to be healthy now and into their future. So from now on, things in the house are going to be a bit different. Have a little 'family meeting.'

I have to agree with CindySue that it's *your* house, your rules. If you want to change them, that's your right. It certainly doesn't mean the kids will be deprived, just that if they're going to eat junk, it's probably not going to be from your fridge anymore.

Best of luck. I wish my parents wouldn't have always kept junk in the house - maybe I wouldn't be on this forum now.

I appreciate all the comments and suggestions, folks. Unfortunately, there's no "right" way to handle it. I wish this was a decision that I made when the children were little.

Right now, we're still just taking the gradual approach. I'm serving a couple of different veggies along with a protein for dinner, skipping the regular rice/potatoe/pasta side dish.

They're still eating snacks, etc., that are primarily carbs, but we'll take it a step at a time.

Tami

I think being a woman, you need to trust your instincts. Women have great instincts. You know your family and how they will react if you come out of the closet with your plans.

Being a mom too, I know that I feel obligated to buy what's the most healthful for my family. (I'm feeling quite lucky now seeing your dilemma- my son's only 2 still!). But I think that we would carry soooo much guilt on our shoulders if our kids grew up to be unhealthy adults because we didn't teach them how to be healthy when we had the chance. When they are at home is when you still have the most influence over them, even if it's unspoken.

I think Sugarbusters is a great plan. That's just sticking to whole foods. Just cutting out processed "rubbish" as Robert so eloquently put it. Cutting out the "whites" and adding in the "browns" (bread, pasta, rice- that is).

I guess you can tell already, my house is sugar free. If my hubby and son want an ice cream then they go out for it to McD's. If I decide to have a weekend off, I may buy some for all of us. But it's a rarity.

Good luck, and trust yourself Mom.

I am not buying anything with sugar in it. What's in the house, when it's gone, it's gone. My son has a little weight problem that I don't want to become a big weight problem.

I don't nag him about it but I do intend to try to help him in a round about way. Our meals have gotten healthier since I started low carbing, but he does still get rice or potatoes with his dinner, he and his father both do.

He does get treats still, but I either buy or make low carb treats for him. He doesn't really care whether the ice cream bar he gets is made with Splenda or sugar. They taste the same. I got him some Blue Bunny Ice Cream bars and told him they were for me, so of course, he wanted some. He thinks they're great. If I told him they were for him, he would never have eaten them.

I'm also getting him to exercise more by telling him that I need company when I go for a walk. I don't want to go by myself, so will he come with me.

I don't buy chips any more. He likes the crunchy cheese that can be nuked in the microwave.

When he comes home from school, he can't grab cookies or a bag of chips, but I keep cans of soup that he likes and he can have that. It's about an even mix of protein and carb instead of all carb.

So I'm working on it. Small steps.

This is an old thread that is always relevent for those of us with children. I have been too heavy all my adult life and when I had kids was about the time I found low carb dieting via Atkins. I decided to tach them about food choices from the beginning. Yes they ate cherios, but now they eat scrambled eggs and bacon, and scottish oats for breakfasts; even leftover roast beef sometimes.

I teach my kids nutrition. It is a slow progression toward less and less refined carb foods. My boys and DH are all thin and trim because I moderate what they have and tell them about the health problems they will have in 50 years IF they eat the crappy foods. Yes, I label the foods that. My youngest already has a strong desire for sweets and breads--it is clearly in the genes. Young people need to understand everything is a choice. If a friend smoke cigarettes, is it then ok to also smoke? Of course not. SO I expect my kids to also be able to choose good foods when faced with bad choices. THey bring a bag lunch because even school lunches are . . . . crappy.

I f you are trying to change the eating habits of teenagers--it is a process. Somethings as a parent you can change immediately. Any change is a good thing in the process.

I've got two short blurbs that might help you feel better about a decision to toss out the junk food. Anecdotes are fun!

First.

My mother has had weight issues since she was a little girl, and by the time she had kids and started a family, she had given up the battle and settled into an obese lifestyle, shopping with an obese mindset, and so growing up none of us kids had any structure or knowledge of what counted as a good meal or portion control. This did not bother me for 20 years, I had a lightning fast metabolism and ate just as much if not more than my little sister, who became obese as a young adolescent.

My metabolism stalled when I was about 20 years old, and now that the playing field has been levelled, neither my sister or I have a practical understanding of building healthy meals, and both of us are struggling with our weight. I am an adult now so I am responsible for my own choices, but each adult is at least in part molded by their parents and environment, because for 18 years kids do not get much of a say in terms of how food is prepared.

I wish my mother had cooked more food healthy and fresh and less out of cans and boxes, because I would probably not be in the situation I am in now considering what a great opportunity I had before my metabolism slowed. When I look at food on a plate, I naturally fill it up like I grew up to expect. When I shop, I pick up a lot of the same canned and boxed convenience foods, like Kraft Dinner, because I had seen my Mom do it a million times.

Whether you are aware of it or not, your children will pick up on these things as they grow up. Even when they are following you in the grocery store texting on their cell phones they are passively observing what foods you are picking up off the shelves, and they will more than likely pick up the same foods when they move out or head off to college. You can't make food choices for them, but you can certainly set a good example!


Second.

My Mom had dieted her whole life, and while there were occasional cupboard clean-outs they did not become permanent until she had a Vertical Sleeve Gastrectomy last year. She had lost interest in food after that, and her shopping reflected that - it was not so much an active, conscious choice to shop smarter for her family, but she went from buying ice cream to greek yogurt, reading labels, and buying less things in bulk, etc.

My Dad and teenaged brother were chubby because of the food they were eating for years, but after my mom's surgery and her altered shopping habits, both of them have slimmed down over the past year as well. Neither of the boys were willing to shop for themselves, so they made due with the food in the house, and are better for it. Neither of them were dieting, my Dad actually started cooking his own meals (Mom can only eat a half a cup of food at a time so she doesn't), but my Dad can only cook with what my Mom has brought home, so the meals became healthier.

My Dad whined a bit at first, but he and my brother have passively improved their diets as a result of my mother's very calculated, carefully measured shopping methods now.

TLDR: Your shopping habits can send very big messages! For better or worse, you lead by example when you are controlling food and meals.

Yes, it's fair, and No, it's not too extreme. I did something like that when my kids were teens. I was a single mom so I didn't have the husband/partner part. It turned out to be such a non-issue. Some thoughts in no particular order:

- The kids just liked having FOOD around that they liked so they weren't hungry and it tasted good. If I had cheese sticks, meat, nuts, and fruits, and veggies with dip, they honestly did not miss junky snacks. They were just HUNGRY especially after school because lunches were so rushed and lousy choices. In fact our house became a bit of after-school-snack central because I said they could eat after school and before dinner, but it had to be real food. And what happened was, my DD and her girl friends, made good sandwiches and snacks for my DS and his guy friends - practicing for superbowl parties I guess. It was expensive to provide real food but very interesting to watch sociologically!

- As I quit buying the bad old stuff I would ask them what they might like for next week. Both parties had to buy into the shopping list. Over time we came up with a new list of staples. Like I don't want to shock anyone with talk of potatoes - but Pik Nik brand shoestrings are like half saturated fat instead of "healthy" veg oil. Not bad as a transition thing.

- I was perfectly fine saying junk food was entertainment and it wasn't coming out of my grocery money. If they wanted it they could use their own allowances and keep it in their room. They each tried once or twice and never spent their money that way again - they much preferred buying Starbucks and movie tickets when out with friends. Junk food was not worth their money, why on earth mine?

- Surprisingly my DD told me she appreciated having non-junk good food always at home. It gave her the feeling of freedom when out and about - if she had junk outside, she knew she had a better baseline to come home to. or that if she had 75% good stuff at home, her indulgences in social life weren't so bad.

- Also surprisingly my DD told me she started to get horrified at how some families still eat. We had transitioned to dinners that were things like steak or salmon, veggies with ginger and garlic, and rosemary potatoes. Then she would go to a friend's house and they would have spaghetti and meatball casserole over mac and cheese. The contrast started to get startling.

I would do it again in a heartbeat with growing kids. Plus it can be a family identity team building thing - "we get a kick out of eating really well"

My BF wants his goodies and pop and chips, I have no choice, there, he is an adult. As for the table, I make that descidion but I don't want to be extream. I will say, none of my children are overweight. My daugter is known for binging on goodies, I'm a binge eater also. My boys aren't normaly binge eaters.

At meals, we have a meat, a carby side and a veggie. The carby side can be potatoes (couple times a week) fruit or on a very rare occasion mac and cheese (BF insists on occasion). I don't allow over eating either, if they want seconds, its going to be on a veggie, if they don't take it, we know they aren't hungry. I don't allow huge piles of food on their plates, they don't need to learn to eat that way. We eat with smaller salad plates (much to BFs distaste) and that seams to creat smaller portion sizes on their own. We havn't had to do it, but my Mother now keeps food on the counter, and you have to get up to get seconds. She said it really cuts down on the amount of food the guys eat. I to have noticed if BF is still full, he will sit there and pick at the extra food on the table. We clear the table quickly to keep that from happening.

I don't want my children thinking that dessert is mandatory, so, I make a dessert type thing once every few weeks. BF thinks he has to have dessert nightly, so he has a locked box stashed in our bedroom with candybars in it. He eats them but the kids have no idea, it doesn't bother me. We have chips for his lunch, but the kids know not to ask for them. They end up with chips for supper once every few weeks along with a meat and veggie of course! BF has pop in the frids also, my oldest will ask permission every now and then for one. The younger ones don't even think to ask about it, they don't see it drank in the house. They drink milk, water or iced tea, no juice, chocolate milk or anything of the sort.

I hate it when my younger kids come home and tell me that juice, raisen cookies, and pastas are heathy. I don't want to tell them that the school is lying to them. Instead I tell them that its ok in small amounts and meats and veggies are most important. When my daughter wants to binge on junk food, I remind her that eating more than a small amount is not healthy. I do tell her the truth about being fat. I tell her that she's better off eating just a little bit of the junk food than alot. Alot of junk food will make you and everyone fat, and its easier to stay slim and healthy than to try to loose the fat down the road. She doesn't complain when I make her and her brother split a large cookie, or if they get a pop, they split it also.

I think we do set good examples, but we can't take it all away, they may binge when they get the chance.


I am the mother/woman of the house, I control the house, especially with my children. If we let them make their own choices, most likely they will make bad choices, they just don't care, yet. Small changes that taste good, then they wont miss the extra crap.

By all means, have the discussion! My daughter has overweight/obese friends that have NO CLUE how to lose weight. They will sit there eating candy (fat free!) And ask me how she can eat so much and stay so thin. (She is 5'8" 110lbs, a lean mean dancing machine that just got the first perfect physical fitness scores on her drill team's summer athletic tests) And she is truly always eating. I point out that she rarely drinks soda, snacks on meat, cheese and berries all day and stays away from carbs naturally. These girls are miserable about their appearances. It breaks my heart that their mothers take them to Jenny Craig or Weight Watchers. And they never learn. Your kids have the advantage of a mother who knows better! Let them benefit from that!

Holy thread necromancy, Batman! This thread is 10 years old, so I suspect the OP has figured it out by now since her kids will have grown up.

This is certainly a relevant subject, but starting a new thread would be a better choice than reviving such an old thread.

Perhaps, but I thought it was worth reading up on. I'm sure others could use this info!

I did little changes as my little ones grew up. I talked about why eating a certain food was a better choice than another. Even today, years later, choices to make. I can't control what they choose outside the house; I can help them inside my home. I don't buy junk food-- I would eat it. I have recently asked that we refrain from baking cakes, cookies and breads to help mommy loose weight and I can play more soccer with them. My 10 year old is more inclided to make good choices ( not many bad ones in my house really) and my younger child is already feeling the NEED for carbs, yet he is thin and trim still. I try to counsel them on keeping to two servings of bread a day and two fruits a day. ( I don't buy juice) THey can eat all the salad they want, and meats and water. ( No soda in the house.)

It is a process. Quick changes can create rebellion unless the teen is completely on board and wants the quick change.

I sometimes have my kids help with the food shopping, to pick out a new veg or new fruit or nut. Some rules apply--no cold cereals, no crackers or traditional snack foods. My kids have learned this over the years so shopping has become easier to stay on target.

Perhaps include them with a night or two when they create a menu, with you supervising initally and guiding to better foods slowly. TO get kids cooking in the kitchen may start with mac and cheese but with time become steak and green beans.

GOod luck-- you are heading in the right direction!!! You know your kids and how to approach change.

It's not a radical change. It makes sense. Not only is that food toxic for anyone's health, but your family on both sides don't have the genetics to handle sugar and starch. That's the same with my family.

I feel that there will be many benefits to cutting out the sugar. For the first 2 weeks, your kids will probably complain and be very moody because there's none of the "good stuff" in the house and they'll go through the same sugar withdrawals we all had to. That's not a bad thing though because it's the same thing as detoxing from heroin or amphetamine. It just has to be done.

While this is going on, you can sneak in a bunch of paleo and/or low-carb comfort food. Ginger pork or Pot roast recipes from MarksDailyApple's website. You can do heavy cream with splenda and frozen strawberries for dessert (if you're not dairy-free). Remember, no one in the house is on a diet. Everyone's eating real food all the time and they'll feel better for it in the end.

Also, and this is very important since your kids are still young, I am going to tell you that since I cut my carbs way back a year and a half ago, I do not have ANY tartar on the back of my upper and lower front teeth. This never happens, they are normally dark brown on the other side and the hygienist has to scrape tons of it off whenever I go in for a checkup. My last checkup, she had nothing to scrape. She just kind of felt around for a second and went onto the next step in my cleaning. Also, I had no cavities. This has not happened since I was in 4th grade. Every time I went to the dentist, I had at least 2 or 3 cavities. Now, none.

I'll also add that I drink coffee. But my teeth are sparkling white nonetheless. My theory is that since there's no tartar buildup from the bread, sugar, pasta, chips, potatoes, you name it... that there's nothing for the coffee "pigments" to stick to. I dunno how true that is, but I know one thing for sure. My teeth are whiter than they were 2 years ago.

Anyway, I'm sure you can add many more reasons for why cutting out sugar will actually make your family happier, more energetic, and have a better experience in medical/dental checkups.