Yesterday I went out with my mother( whom I love very much) for lunch. In the restaurant the subject of weight came up. A few years ago, she had lost 60 pounds but has since packed on about 20. I have lost over 30 pounds and I was telling her how great it felt. she asked me" What scale did you weigh yourself on?Because the medical one at my house doesn`t have springs and would be more acurate." I then asked her, what do you think it will read, more or less?( To avoid any misunderstandings), she said, wellllllllllllll....In my opinion , less than 30 pounds...I was floored, but I didn`t let it show. I felt so hurt. Anyone else ever felt like that with a loved one?

jaybee...perhaps a bit of jealousy got in the way here? maybe difficult for some people close to acknowledge your progess because of this. the other side of this is people that know youve lost and say nothing. look at your accomplishments. smile about it!

joe

Thanks Joe, I mean all the logic is there, but even I was surprised at how it made me feel. Parents sure have a knack for making us feel like kids again huh? lol..where is Canada are you from?

so true....guess it their perogative. just that i AM a kid, and my kids know it too!

manitoba here...you?

I went home this summer, wearing a size 12! Personally, I thought (and still do) that I looked a lot lighter than I weighed. Which at the time was 165. My run in with jealousy reared its head in my older sister.

Actually I think she was getting tired of hearing about this WOE. She is going to have the stomach by-pass surgery soon and I was hoping that she would at least try this before she did. My mother and other sisters pushed me into trying to convince her.

Anyway, upon pointing out how easy the program was for me, and how well I was losing. Along with the fact that for some reason you look smaller than you really are on this program, I had her to guess how much I weighted . (OK, I guess I had it coming ) Her answer was 170'S. WELL shut me up!

To prove my point on jealousy, all my other sister, and sister-in-law were shocked I weighted that much.

In the words of my father-in-law. "Whatcha gonna do?"

I've been competing with my mother my whole life!! Not that I've wanted to, not by choice, because it was forced on my, by my mothers jealousy of any good thing, mostly in appearance, that would happen to me. I put in an engagedment picture in the paper, 6 yrs ago, of myself and fiancee, and she said ", you picked a picture that made you look good"! Then when I started atkins she looked up every negative article she could about atkins, and was reading them one by one to me. I did not respond, because I was so used to this behavior! So guess what, She's on it now, along with my dad. Theres a whole history of this between my mother, and I. She was Miss Kankakee, the town we lived and grew up in, I was a cheerleader. I had to be the best at everything I did, because I wanted to be told by my mom, just once, that I made her proud. It never happened! But I do admit she is alittle better. Anyway, hope this helps, Knowing that someone else experiences the same kind of hurt.

You are such great support for me, ya know? Sometimes, eventhough you know what to do, just getting some feedback gets you back on that path you were on before the "incident" happened. My mom is a good person, but I think that I put too much stock into what she says. I am that much more determined now, thanks. p.s. I live in Quebec, where the labeling laws prevent me from getting good carb food.

I remember back in college (1984ish) that I went to a nutritionist and had lost 45 lbs in 4 months. I was down to 140 and felt great. My dad made a mean comment one night that I was going to "fat school." Around the same time, when I was dating my ex-husband, my future brother-in-law was in town, so I had them both at my parents house. My dad made a comment to my future brother-in-law about how his brother was with a fat chick. Of course at the time, my dad was still a drunk. He always had to pick on someone for something and I think it was his way of making himself feel better. I was so hurt and it still hurts to think about it after 20 years, but it was HIS problem, not mine. My dad is better now, but he still says stupid shit sometimes. I was just home in August visiting and he always had some negative comment about how my perfume "stinks." It's funny because I always get comments from other people about how good it smells. Some people just need SOMETHING to gripe about. What comes around, goes around.

Yup, my sister, who's about 40 lbs heavier than me (or more) is always making little digs, or claiming it "harder" for her..... while eating a dozen doughnuts a day....

The_foth-- My sister lives in Manitoba, please keep her!

Geez Zora, that has got to be tough. Reading your story as an outsider, I can see more clearly my situation, thanks for sharing. Potatofree, your sister must be IN pain as much as she may be a pain to you sometimes.Have a great day.

The way it works in my family is they will give you alittle applause but never the great thundrous standing ovation type. I think we were brought up with the understanding that you can always better yourself so the great thunderous applause can never happen. Oh well I have friends for that and I know my family loves me. What more can you want eh?
angie

GRRRR ~ WOMEN! Always feeling like they are competing with eachother. You are very beautiful, Im sorry your mother is willing to admitt it.

It sounds like perhaps a bit of jealousy. I know how you feel though. I just hit my 30lbs lost mark today and up until about a week ago, no one noticed. My really close family said they saw a difference, but I think they just thought they did.. cause people I hadent seen in a while didnt notice. But then I went to my Mom's wedding and got new clothes and had so many compliments, it was great.

Also that thing your mom said about scales with springs being more accurate, technically is true, but barely. I have a medical scale at my house. I paid over $450 CDN for it, because when I started atkins I was 370 and I couldnt find a scale large enough for me. It's a beautiful scale, holds up to 500lbs and is accurate.... but now that im under 350, I can use my roommates scale and there is virtually no difference (hers is a spring scale and it shows about 2lbs more than mine).

Anyways dont listen to her and just keep loosing weight. Ive realized all you need to do is know that you are loosing weight and it doesnt matter what anyone else thinks. Look at me, I am 337 and im still huge. When I meet new people they must think "wow, hes fat"... but little do they know im on the road to success and just 3 short months ago I was A LOT fatter.

Rock on!!!!!!!

oh and by the way, I should say that I also have something like this going on with my sister. It looks like there is something like this in every family. I am a guy though, so it's not woman vs woman, but my sister is still hurtful. She struggles with her weight. I think she is about 158 or so, not fat, but not skinny. Anyways, she critized atkins OVER AND OVER. She did weight watchers and was successful at it, but she is a fanatic and anything that isn't weight watchers is bad. So for months she said I was killing my body and stuff. Then just this summer she picked up the book and actually read some of it and guess what? She decided she wanted to do it. What a hypocrite. Since then, she has decided not to do it. I think personally she is scared of letting go of her weight watchers "comfort zone". But anyways, even after she read the book she still critizses me. She says that I "don't do the diet properly". I admit, I might not be perfect, but who is??? I know I could eat more vegetables, I know I could drink less diet pop and I know I could get more exercise, but I am improving slowly and it's none of her business.

Ahh felt good to vent that out On a side note, both people I live with are also on a normal diet, so it's very hard for me to keep going. In fact, I have no personal close friends on atkins, i'm all alone. But I know that once I get down to my goal weight and i'm healthy and people see that I lost over 130lbs, well... I think ill have a lot more people around me doing atkins. It's fun being a pioneer