I am so sad right now. My hubby made a comment on my butt being to jiggly and that I needed to firm it up. I dont know why but it upset me so much. I am still crying about it. My hubby never tells me that I am beautiful are that I am attractive. Always seems like hes critical about me so my feelings are hurt. TOM doesnt help my sensitivity right now. So now hes made at me for crying and being upset about his comment. I guess I really shouldnt let it bother me I lost 24 pounds so far and I think I look good. But I just wish he would complament me oh well I guess I shouldnt expect that. Im going to go be sad for the rest of the day now

Awww I'm so sorry that hubby made you cry. Men can be so insensitive sometimes!! Do not cry anymore. You have come such a long way and are doing SO good!!!! You look mahhhhvelous dahlink!!

and I assume you're married to Brad Pitt I don't blame you for being upset, that wasn't a nice thing to say. Now, you've lost 24 lbs., take yourself out and buy something to make you feel better.

Vikki

i think you should tell your husband how much that comment hurt you and that he should be more supportive and understanding of your new way of life... i'm sure he will say that you're 'overreacting' or being too 'sensitive' but that's still no excuse for him to make you feel bad... men have no idea how much we look to them for approval and that's a sad thing to admit but it's true... it has taken me years to finally realize that the first person i should love, is myself...

you have come a long way and should be proud of your accomplishment, regardless of what anyone else thinks... you are doing this for YOU, remember that...

things like this make me happy to be single... ;-)

~jodi

He sounds like my Ex husband..He would always say things like that after the birth of my kids...I just used it as a motivater...Don't get sad ...get mad.. Then make him eat his heart out! you're doing fine.. I do think its a man thing though I had to tell my current hubby about being critical...We had a big blow out about it then a calm talk about it, He said he didn't realize it was making me feel bad..So now he tries to tell me good things. I told him I'm my own worse critic I don't need another one! How about a cheerleading section? Instead of the Siskel & Ebert show? That fixed that...hang in there!

I'm sorry to hear that... I know how painful it is when somebody you care about says something like that. And like you said... it's your TOM. Me too. My poor fiancé has been having to deal with me and my oversensitivity. I'm sure if he said something like that to me, I would've stopped talking to him for a couple of days. Not on a normal day. Just on a PMS day. I would've been SO HURT.

Like others have said, just realize that you've come a long way and don't let his words diminish that. Sometimes people do say things without realizing the harshness of their words. Sad to say, but I'm like this. It's like... stuff just pours out of my mouth before my brain has time to really think about what I'm saying. Not a very good habit and definitely not one I'm proud of.

That was a jerky thing to say. How freakin' rude!
Is he Mr. Freakin America? Does he have any flaws? Blow it off. You should be doing this for you not for him. As long as you feel good about yourself that is all that matters.

If this was a one time thing talk to him about it. If there is a pattern forming where he is constantly critisizing you and insulting you, esp. when ever you lose weight or do something to better yourself, you might try a counsler or clergy counsler for both of you. It could be he is insecure about your weight loss, or feels a need to be controlling with out even realizing what e's doing. Having a third person to help you two learn to communicate could make you both happier.

Hmmmm. First, I have been married 31 years to the same lady. I have one grown daughter. I was raised in a house of just me and the Mom and my 3 baby sisters. See a pattern? Just me and the girls!
I learned a long time ago if I did not want my chitlins handed to me in a gunny sack to never fail to compliment when sincere and to try my level best not to comment if it was unflattering.
Now, wild guess, that from where you started your LC WOE to today there are hundreds of wonderful things to say nice about you. I KNOW there are dozens and dozens! And I don't even know you!
Trust me. Your husband is in the wrong over this one!
Best I can offer is that I am remarkably proud of you for the success you have managed! And it is remarkable. You have done so very good in gaining health for yourself.
Look around you. You have some very dear friends in here who care about you as a person. THAT has got to be worth at least one small smile today.

OK. You can frown again, now.

At some point, when you are feeling better, let your husband know how his comments hurt you. Unless he is a very callous person, he will make amends.

My best wishes for your day to get better and for you to know what a truly wonderful job you have already done at improving your health.

I don't blame you for being sad! Anyone who is trying to get healthy would have been hurt by that comment.

My DH gets frustrated at me sometimes when I cry over things that he doesn't understand..... I just remind him that I really don't need a reason to cry much less one that makes sense to anyone else! If you feel like crying.... CRY
You'll probably feel better afterwards! In the meantime, grab a pair of pants you use to wear before starting this WOE and put them on! That should brighten your spirits!

Keep up the good work!

see now when someone hurts me I at least think mean. . .so this might cross your mind next time he says anything . . ."sure buddy, I may have a jiggley butt, but I am losing weight. .. but you sir on the other hand will always have the disablity of having your head up your butt. . .THAT is irreversable. And if you manage against all odds to pull it out. . .you will still be a poop head!" redawn

he is obviously rude & insensitive, but you've gotten good advice about that issue. And we are all VERY proud of you for your progress!!

As for the jiggly butt issue-are you doing any exercise? This can greatly help as the inches come off, so that you look as good as you feel! I personally do a little weight-lifting-at home. It has really helped as I have dropped clothing sizes.

Anyway, do this for you first of all-and keep up the great effort!!

Next time he says something negative about you, make fun of his weiner. It's been my experience that guys don't appreciate that very much. LOL.

Ok, ok. That's what I would do, but I'm just a witch in smaller clothing.

I think that was very insensative of him. He should be severly punished. (be creative. mash up a little canned dog food and tell him it's a new LC dish that you're trying out. Make him taste it first.)

I know, I'm sadistic, but this is how I deal with my family. They expect nothing less from me.

~Angi~

he is probably feeling insecure and a bit jealous of your weight loss .It still is no excuse but many men start freaking out when we start to look BETTER!You have done a great job.Be proud of yourself and keep to this WOL. I hope your day gets better sweetie!

First off, sorry your DH (dumb not dear) has to make himself feel superior to you by saying rude things. He is probably feeling insecure about your weightloss and knows (obviuosly) how to get to you.

NOW, he did not "make you cry." You responded to his comment, with hurt and tears, but only you can make you feel or do anything. Don't give him that power! Instead of saying to him, "you made my upset!" Say, "I am crying because your I feel your comments were insensitive and hurtful, deal with it!" There is a subtle yet significant difference (see what happens when you grow up with a psychologist Dad???)

If my DH (still dumb, not dear) makes a comment about any fat on my body (he rarely does, He know better) I just say, "Yeah, OK Gut-Boy. Why don't you say that again when you can see your 'goods' without looking in a mirror???" That usually works!