I am new to this and I have to admit, the thought of sharing my personal feelings online to a million strangers makes me a little queezy.

I am just starting my LC journey. I have been struggling with my weight my whole life, particularly the past 11 years. My insecurity, low self-esteem and depression is beginning to have a negative impact on my relationships with family, friends and loved ones.

I was always outgoing and very active throughout highschool and college. These days i am happy hiding away in my house. The need to be alone, mopy and depressed is beginning to take a toll on my long term relationship. It has gotten to the point that i dont even want to be around him. I dont want him to touch me and i get nervous and defensive when he stares. i've put so many restrictions on our relationship i am afraid its not going to last yet it's the only thing that brings me joy.

I want the weight gone NOW. I hate waiting and i hate hearing that it will take so long to see any improvement. The LC approach has given me hope that i could be seeing results soon. I need encouragement, advice, hope, more information etc. what books should i read, what ones are a waist of my time, how can i regain my confidence? how do i shop? i am on a limited budget and my biggest downfall is buying pasta's, waffles, breads, CEREALS!! etc.

i am at the point where i dont even answer my cell phone or my house phone, i no longer go out with my girlfriends and i hate running into people i know. I am embarrassed and ashamed. any encouragement would be greatly appreciated.

sorry this sounds so depressing... i hope as the days go by my spirits will lift.