hey guys.

just got back from the doc's.

apparantly am suffering from clinical depression.

i have felt bad for awhile, but didn't realize it was THAT. i was so hoping
it wouldn't be that, that it was my thyroid.

but my thyroid is now normal for the first time in three years and now i AM suffering from depression.

and this time around i'm really feeling it. i feel so hopeless about getting this weight off. life just doesn't seem...interesting any longer. i'm job hunting(i currently have a job but they're cutting down hours majorly).

i'm in school making a 4.0. i didn't think i was depressed but that explains the no energy sad feelilng all the time.

i'm thrilled that my thyroid is corrected, but am still just majorly lacking energy and am just...sad.

i have been focusing the last week on cutting out carbs because i feel it's half the problem. praise god i have kept the 40 pounds off i lost during the binges! i feel so lucky.

but i just...don't care about my weight any more. i'm tired of messing with it but at the same time i know i won't just let myself go because i hated being 200lbs and it's much better here at 165.

but i just don't have the energy and just don't care any more.

i'm on lexapro and i'm starting counseling within the next two weeks, but until then, any advice? i'm considering spending the day playing my guitar, going to the gym and swimming. i think that'll get my mind off of wanting to order a pizza and gorge my face with it.

i have always used food as my comfort and i know that it's not a help. i'm looking for other activities to get my mind off food. because wether i care about my weight or not i know binging on food won't solve problems.

what do you guys think? i have gotten great support here in the past, and i thank everyone who has stopped by my journal or anwered my posts. i'd be so thankful for help this time around too. and if anyone needs to vent, feel free to stop by my journal as well. i'd be happy to help if i can.

thanks so much guys.

Oh, hon, I wish I had just the right thing to tell you. If you don't want to stress about food, maybe it would be a good idea to transition to Maintenance for a while. Tell yourself no flour, sugar, white rice or white potatoes, and just eat whatever else you're hungry for. That's pretty much how I'm handling pregnancy maintenance, and it is a relief not to be counting carbs and calories anymore. I just keep healthy foods around the house and eat what I want out of that selection. Going out to eat is more of a challenge, though.

I think your idea of swimming is a great one. Exercise is a terrific way to get your mind off of something!

I've noticed that a lot of people at my school who do very well overwork themselves and have problems with depression. I've never had to deal with it personally, but I've had several close friends who have struggled with it. If looking at the scale might make you feel worse, why not just ignore the scale for a few weeks and do the best you can eating low carb without being too stressed about it. If you find that you must turn to food for comfort, how about some veggies? I find that warm green beans are quite satisfying. Exercise and sunshine might help as well.

Good luck! I hope you're feeling better in no time. And for now, just remember that we're all here for you. If you ever need someone to talk to, please just drop me a pm.

There are so many people depressed in the world now a days. I swear it is something they put in our food!

I say stick to it and you will feel a ton better about making the decision. Get out with some friends for a bit. Do something...go have fun!!! It will make you feel better!

HI - My experience has been that it can take up to a month before the medication really starts helping with the depression so don't expect any magic bullets there. Time now for some personal TLC and only you can decide what that means for you. Given how you feel I agree with the other postings saying to hide the scale and focus just on eating healthy even if that means you settle into a maintenance range for awhile. I like the idea of swimming and/or strumming on the guitar - so long as what you play doesn't enhance your sadness. For me, I know one way to focus on myself and relax and not think about food is to sit down with a good book. I can close out everything - including the desire to munch or the cleaning and laundry that might need to be done. Try to think of something like that in your life that just makes you feel good and do it. You already know that food doesn't really do it because as fast as you shovel it your mind keeps reminding you that you really don't want to be doing that. I have one friend who used to go visit people in rest homes or hospitals when she was feeling down - I don't know if that would work, but I thought I would mention it. Hang in there Flynnlee, it will get better it truly will!

As one who deals with periodic depression I can truly sympathize. It isn't fun at all, and going out and doing something fun never works for me. No matter what I do, the depression is still there until it goes away.

I'm an emotional eater, too (as I think we all are) and one thing I've found after 9 months of LC is the foods I want to grab for comfort are generally the high-carb stuff like pizza. I have found it extremely helpful to just continue on with eating LC, making sure I don't get too hungry, because I physically can't binge on LC foods.

Someone mentioned the other day that high-carb foods actually cause the body to release an endorphin which does indeed make us feel better, so this is why our bodies want to head in that direction when we're feeling low. Just stick with the true path, and when you really need something (I do occasionally) try one of the goodies in the recipe section--likely as not you'll only be able to eat a small amount of it, which is way better than binging on carbage.

thanks guys.

i'm going out with a friend tonight so maybe it'll help some.

i'll post later!

flynlee:

I'd recommend trying a medication like Wellbutrin instead of Lexapro. All the SSRI antidepressant medications will limit your ability to lose weight. Wellbutrin is scientifically proven not to. (It works in a different fashion.) It also will not mess with your sex drive. (I don't know about you, but that was important to me.)


I am a big believer in psychotherapy -- so I'm really glad to hear you'll be starting that. One option is to try to schedule an appointment sooner than two weeks. Most therapists can squeeze you in, if you're having a real crisis.

Your ideas about getting out and active are great ones. Exercise is a natural antidepressant. Do whatever you can to stay active. I found Mini Golf was a big help for me in my darkest hours. I'd go in the middle of the weekdays, and no one was there, and I was able to really get in touch with myself and relax a little.

My therapist was heavily into what they call Mindfulness-based Cognitive Therapy, which basically uses Meditation as a way to manage how you're feeling. (Basically, the more conscious you are of how you REALLY feel, the more you can recognize depressive thoughts for what they are.) Maybe this would help you out too.
http://www.wholehealthmd.com/hc/dep...736,453,00.html

On a personal note, my wife and I are moving to Bixby later this month. So hello from a future OKie.

H

I too know EXACTLY how you feel....I have sufferred from major depression on and off for years..just coming out of a major down right now...I know how badly we turn to carbs, alcohol whatever we crave etc for comfort when we are in pain....I have found that what has helped me this time round and I have written it in my personal journal at home(not the one here) that although I can't control the gremlins in my head or how the meds will work or when the depression will lift I CAN CONTROL WHAT GOES IN MY MOUTH! It is the only thing I can totally rule!

Everytime I really feel like binging I look at an old and new pic of myself and an old and new pair of jeans. I tell myself the same thing over and over I can control what goes in my mouth!!

It has helped me big time.....for those that have not been down the depression highway it is hard to understand how dark it can be....hang in there, you know it can get better...don't undo your good work....keep lots of good for you food around, especially the LC foods you especially enjoy.

On another note, how under control is your thyroid? Is it just at normal levels fo most people? What is your TSH? My shrink keeps mine as low as possible. around 1 as depression is majorly influenced by your thyroid and vice versa.....Plus you may want to try something besides Lexapro..it can pack on the pounds....been there...I have tried them all
You can also PM me anytime.....

Consult your doc first, of course, but fish oil is EXCELLENT for depression, as well as bipolar disease. I took antidepressants for years (first Prozac and later Celexa) and have now been off them for several years, including a couple of very stressful times when normally I'd have needed to go back on the meds.

Has anyone had success with the Low Carb Shakes. I'm just starting and sometimes I'm rushing in the morning to get out the door to work and I don't have time for eggs or bacon...Are the Atkins Shakes okay during the Induction phase.