I wasn't sure where to post this. I was thinking confessions, but my feelings were really involved...So here goes...I was doing so great on my plan. I was actually down to 154.5 yesterday morning, which is the lowest weight I have been in two years. I am exercising like I love to, and getting alot stronger and things have been great. I should say that I have been doing this since about the middle of feb. (the first time was Aug 2003). Anyways, I have had to put up with my DH eating all kinds of crap around me, taking me to eat out where there aren't many good choices, and all kinds of temptations. I have been very very dedicated. He has attempted to start LC at least 3 other times. Finally, starting this sunday he got serious about it and is doing it. So that is the first of my feelings. I don't know how I feel with him actually sticking to LC and losing weight. For some reason this is upsetting me. Is it because it takes the success focus off of me? He has been very supportive of me and my efforts.
Secondly, I feel very uncomfortable with my weight loss. I am thrilled be at a weight I haven't been in forever, but it makes me feel vulnerable at the same time. (I am working hard to get over this. This is one of those really personal things and I believe stems from my issues with the "before" me that was very attractive. I was in several bad situations with men).
Then, I was also depressed last night for really the first time in three months since I got serious about losing weight, and I just didn't know how to deal. Well, I did know that I should exercise or something, but after exercising in the morning and a 10 hour work day, I probably should just have gone to bed.
Also (and sorry for any men, skip this part), I was feeling very hormonal as TOM is coming...
SOOOOO, I had all of these feelings/issues/whatever upsetting me last night and I thought food would make it better like it used to. Well, I found out things have changed! Nothing tasted that great really, and then I didn't get that old happy feeling that I used to when I would eat the carb foods. Instead, I got more upset and depressed and put on 5 pounds! I realize this is mostly water weight, but still, that upsets you more.
I don't know what my point is in posting this. I guess to just get it off my chest and see if others have similar problems or experiences. I still got up this morning for my exercise and I am having a very low cal day (just not eating much). I have heard all the things to do when you get the urge to cheat (read, exercise, take bath, etc, etc), and usually I do them...its just, what do you do when you feel your world/feelings/whatever is out of control and it just overcomes you???

i was having one of those days yesturday & posted about & was able to make it through the day with the help of my new LC friends. just venting made me feel better and knowing that i'm not the only one who feels this way really helped.

i too am pmsing- for the 1st time since LCing and the 1st time since over a year ago actually since i was pregnant & recently had a baby... thank god i was able to make it through the day without binging. i did feel like just giving up. today is a new day, tho- and although im still crampy and depressed and moody, i feel so much better.

i've been trying to get my dh to lc too, but he isn't hearing it. as much as i'd like him to get healthier too, i think i'd probably be prone to jealousy too. because A.) i have eating faults and habits that he doesn't and B.) men tend to lose faster than women. its really hard to LC around non-LCers- especially ones like my dh who baked a batch of brownies on the 1st day of my TOM. he didnt know any better- he had no idea, but its still hard nonetheless.

i can totally relate. its not easy. like i said, i pretty much wrote this post yesturday in another forum, but u can and will make it through with a little determination

I want to be basically supportive; sounds like you got about all the lesson you could out of the weekend. The bigger question is, how can you prevent such "perfect storms" coming together in the future?

1. TOM is pretty predictable, and for me, I have to work to recognize that particular spike bad feeling that's hormonal, NOT "real" stuff. It always PRESENTS as a "true situation," but I vastly over-react. Sometimes that energy can be useful, when it gets me to do something I would normally let roll for one more month.

2. The other two--that's going to be a problem. How are you dealing with feelings now? Would suggest a regular journaling time because that's what works for me; I get to unload everything privately and then step away from it and I don't have to pick it all back up. I prefer paper to digital. Depending on how comfortable you are with writing, you can play with some of the sticky situations and devise different outcomes--write your own play. Shred the stuff if you're afraid someone will see it.

The real trick to handling the bad times is do what you can to prevent them. For me, journaling is as important as brushing my teeth--it helps to keep my emotional life strong.

Thank you both for the support and words of encouragement. The thing with my TOM is its not stable for me. It seems to come in 2 month cycles...meaning, the first month I started LCing I had no prob with cravings or bad feelings. The second month was horrid, and as I think back, I did eat a few things I probably shouldn't have...nothing major. The third time was like the first, hardly noticed it. Then comes this month....I don't know. This probably isn't a normal thing, maybe just for me, so I will try to be on-gaurd every other month... I dunno-
Journaling sounds like a great idea to help vent. Its been several years since I had one, as i make excuses not to find the time to do it, even tho I enjoyed it. I will have to make an effort to get into that. I go running 5 days a week, so I usually use that time to run things thru my head, but I do know that writing it down can help the "release".
Hopefully, I will get it under control for next time.

Might help if you think of it as twins or sisters, and one's just more sensitive than the other. You'd know how to handle two different friends...