ugh- im a wreck. i was passed up for the promotion i wanted at work for a man. im totally more qualified than him- my credentials are WAY better. i was motivated, driven, focused and really wanted this job. it was perfect for me. i kicked a$$ in my interview and thought i had it in the bag. to be fair- he did hold a higher position in the company than me to begin with, but my education and experience and seniority far outweighed his. and his only reason for wanting the job was for better hours. i guess the company had no choice but to accomidate him- but im just appalled that they just gave him the job- just handed it to him because he asked for it. i dont get the sense in it at all. why not give the job to someone who was so in it to really make a difference versus taking the chance of losing someone over hours. yes, he was an asset to the company as much as i am, i guess- but do they really think hes going to do as good a job as i would of? hell no. especially when he was honest about the fact he only wanted the job for the hours because he was suffering marital problems because of his hours. ya- he's real career driven. i mean u gotta do what u gotta do, but wtf. and to boot, this guy is someone i would have really considered a friend. i mean he helped me prepare for my interview and everything- and then cut me off at the knees. he swears he didnt plan it and bla bla bla. i played the part and told him there were no hard feelings, but there is. and im totally digusted with the company now. and dont even want to go to work anymore. ive never felt like this- i love my job- always have- and would not even have been upset if i was passed up for someone more qualified than me, but this whole thing is just a crock of $hit. i've been contemplating applying for HIS job, but its really not for me. his job includes disciplining people- the one i applied for wasnt. other than that, they were pretty similar- motivation and development, sales, etc. i dont know how i feel about disciplining people- its really not my thing- i was more looking for something where i could provide positive feedback, etc.

well, i just dont know how to handle it. i cant talk to him- or my boss because i'll just be viewed as a "sore loser" and hinder myself from doing anything else. im sure a pint of ben and jerrys would help to temporarily ease the pain and disappointment, but im not going there. i thought a walk this morning would have helped, but it didnt. i feel like complete $hit about it. ahhh- the joys of being a woman in corporate america.

sorry this was so long, but venting helped a little. thanks

I am so sorry. I am not a working woman, but that does not keep me from feeling badly for you. I do not blame you for being upset, most people in your position woud feel the same way. If you feel strongly about it, there is no harm in looking at other jobs and seeing what is out there. You have a job while you look and it is always easier to find a job, when you have a job.
I truely wish you the best and hope you can work out your feelings, as I am sure it is hard to go to work and face them right now. I cannot imagine helping someone prepare to apply for a job and then knowingly taking it from them, that was very wrong of him. If he was going to apply for it, he owed you the truth so you knew he was going to do that.
Again, I am sorry, I hope you can work through your feelings so you can stay where you are as it seems you do like your job. If not, I truely hope you can find another wonderful job to take its place. Stephie

Did you know that eating lots of protein will also help those feelings? And you'll still be in control of one thing that really matters to you.

All your feelings are still very raw and new and hurting. Hang on for a few days before making any huge decisions. Control the part of your life that you CAN control. Eat everything in sight IF it is on your LC plan. Put mayonnaise on everything. Or whipped cream. You can't go far wrong with those.

Jemman~
Sorry to hear of your dissappointment. I can relate. You may want to reconsider applying for 'his' position, you can use a positive approach to discipline.

Good for you for not diving in the B&J. It will not help, but the guilt will make you feel worse. You could eat some LC Ice Cream.

Good Luck to you. I belive you will get your sunny disposition back soon.

You know, there is just not a "pleasant" way around this. If this is someone you liked, and who hasd always been honest then I would say believe him - maybe he really didnt' think he would get it. That said, take advantage of the situation - if he is now in a position to help you, then use that - make it very clear you want to move up, and make all of your qualifications, etc known to your supervisors.

I say, if his job is a move up, then go for it. I agree with Renkin that you can discipline in a positive way. I've had both kinds of bosses and I can tell you, the one who used reasoning and cared about the employee was more respected as a person. Athough I can fully understand your feelings of no longer wanting to work for that company. I too was passed for a promotion. I worked there for only 1 year, but I was qualified. They told me that I would not be considered unless I worked there 3 years...ok, fine, until they hired someone off the street for the job...no experience, no job history, and with enought skills to get buy. I did leave that job. Do I regret it..sometimes, only because if I stayed, I would have eventually got promoted, instead I've gone from a worse job to worse job to no job. Good luck with whatever decision you make.