Precious -

I had the same feelings as you do about gyms, then I got in a car accident. To regain the use of my left arm I had to do terrible, painful, boring physical therapy. It was a huge goal to be able to "graduate" to a gym, but still I was VERY stressed out over everything from hard-bodied women making me feel bad, to young guys seeing me lift puny amounts...everything. But I had no choice and so I went. I also had no choice but to use a trainer for the first week or two because I had to make sure I didn't hurt myself.

Of course, I was praying not to get a young buffed out guy trainer...but of course, I did. This turned out to be a life saver. The guy was totally nice and encouraging. He knew some of the hard bodied women in there and listening to them talk, I got the impression that they were really a lot nicer than I gave them credit for.

I realized that the fit "cute" women at the gym weren't making me feel bad with their "attitude" but rather, that I was making myself feel bad with my low self-esteem and lack of comfort with my body.

Becuase I was injured and thus had to take it easy, I was able to take classes and feel like it was okay for me to work at my own pace. Suddenly I noticed that I wasn't the only person taking it slow. A lot of seemingly fit people have issues that aren't immediately obvious.

Anyway, my gym is now like my second home. I am here because we moved out of state for a year and without my work outs, I gained 35 pounds! :-0, but now that I am back at the gym I feel so great. Even though I am more overweight than I have ever been in my life, I know as long as I keep going to the gym I am doing something super important for my health.

I would encourage you to check out the variety of gyms in your area. They might cost less than you think. And explore times when you would be more comfortable going. Maybe you could even post a notice saying that you are looking for a work-out partner who is trying to lose the same number of pounds as you are.

While you can defintiley work out at home, it can be SO much harder to stick to a schedule and to get the right work out, and also, to push yourself to the next level. A good gym offers education and support as well as great equipment and companionship from other people at your fitness level.

Good luck with whatever you choose!

Kim