WHY does my self-esteem have to be SO tied to my weight? I usually feel pretty good about myself, my wonderful family, and my life...then out of nowhere you get sucker-punched! My wl is going OK!...not very fast compared to some, but since we are still messing with my thyroid dose I expected slow results. Anyway, we have a wedding to attend this weekend. When this happens I generally go out the day before and go to every department store and try to squeeze into the largest petite size (I'm short & heavy!). I don't buy anything I love just something that fits! This time I'm not going to waste my money. I was down to 2 outfits...one the buttons are short of popping...not flattering and another fall suit (skirt & top)...which looks pretty nice, but not what I had in mind.

I just feel awful when I think of all of my dh friends slender wives in their sexy little cocktail dresses at the wedding while I wear my matronly suit. I know I have so much to offer, but I am already dreading the event because of my weight and yet again I will be the "heavy" spouse.

I truly get anxiety attacks when I go to these events (especially when I haven't seen people in a long time) because I feel like everyone is thinking "boy is she fat!"

I know I should look on the positive side...I am losing, but sometimes it just gets me down!

Thanks for listening to my vent! I am intelligent woman and I know my self-esteem shouldn't be tied to the numbers on the scale, but it is!

Take care,
Elle