Tue, May-20-03, 20:09
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New Member
Posts: 5
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Plan: No plan, just reducing sugar and carbs
Stats: 190/155/140
BF:
Progress: 70%
Location: Seattle, Washington, USA
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walking the path
Hi. My name is Jennifer and I'm a carboholic.
I've been unhappy with the way I feel since I was 16 years old. I've also used sugar as a drug for most of that time. About a year ago I cut out overt sugars, but still used honey and other things to self-medicate. I was diagnosed with an endocrine disorder and had surgery in January to correct the problem. Following the surgery I was very strict about what I ate and managed to stay in a pretty good mood.
About a month ago I let my guard down. Sushi, noodles, pasta of all kinds, bread, and even again with the "naturally-sweetened" things entered my diet. I decided I "deserved" peanut butter and jelly sandwiches. Soon I was living to eat instead of the other way around.
I caught on to this trend due to the way my mood has plummeted in the last few weeks. I have become extremely sensitive to noises and other distractions and I hurt "inside." Everything seems hopeless, I am surrounded by this ocean of hopelessness and despair.
Yesterday I got back on the WOE in earnest. Today is my second day. This morning I felt a little better but this evening I feel terrible. I cried all the way home from the grocery store, for absolutely no reason that I could rationalize, except that I felt so bad.
I have taken Prozac and Celexa in the past and I suppose I will take them again if this feeling doesn't lift. I really want to believe it will as a result of an improved diet. This morning I had dreams full of sadness and chocolate cake. I am afraid I am broken, permanently.
Any consolation from others would be welcome, or similar stories of pain and (maybe) recovery.
Jenn
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