Hello to you all!
Sitting here late, unable to sleep due to low carb night restlessness I 've gone all philosophical. Its probally a lot of utter nonsense but if any place is the place to share these self indulgent ramblings its hopefully here!
This forum has already become a daily necessity for me. Thank you very much for it!I can feel very lonely in this low carb pursuit and its amazing to know that so many others are going through the same things and has made me twice as determined.
I did atkins for 4 months last year and lost30 pounds really easily--my problem is alcohol. I love it! I dont think I've ever had a problem with it but I really enjoy it socially!
However I hate my body more than I love alcohol...so to a large extent it has to go!!
I'm in my 12th day of a clean induction. I have felt extremely anxious that this isnt going to work a second time--I know that I have over low fat dieted to the extent that my body just laughs at my pathetic attempts to eat less calories--I even did that cabbage soup diet in desperation once and lost no weight at all even with a strenous work out every day. Low carb is all that seems to work.
Any way back to my original thought. Today for the first time I have 'felt ' thin and that I am loosing weight: ) I cant believe that even with the miracle of low carb I have lost more than 2 pounds at the most since yesterday--but I feel 2 stone lighter-and look that way to myself too!!!??? With that comes the confidence in myself as a sexy woman and the determination to keep the diet up. Problem is I can't weigh myself to confirm it. I find that if I weigh myself and the results dont match my
prior confidence that I feel worse than if I just pigged out on chips(at least then I have the pampering feeling of having treated myself!!-though its not really treating myself in the long run is it?) I find it really hard to weigh myself more than once every few weeks--I go by the theory that the longer I leave it the more chance I have of actually having lost weight-so I put it off and off!! I try not to do it until I already know for a fact I've lost weight and even then antcipation that I am going to get on a scale can keep me up at night. It may come as no surprise that I was in past life, mildly bulemic! So the line between healthy dieting and obession is a very thin line-hence my fear of the scales and the power they have over my happiness!

The point I'm very badly making is that for me this feeling I have today is the best it ever gets for me. I 've got down to target weight 3 times in my life and still had many days when I feel like a fat, sluggish, pig and found it hard to believe anyone finds me attractive. Being thin didnt take that away! However I still strive constantly for this goal --and whilst I'm doing it I will try to re educate my mind to think more positvely about myself whatever my weight.

Anyone experience any thoughts like this-or should I just go get my coat now : )
Apreciation for anyone who has bothered to wade through this essay - and good luck to us all!! xxx

Yes yes yes. Most ppl here threw out the scale. It can fluctuate too often to gauge. Just use your intuition, the way your clothes fit. You don't EVER have to weigh in if you don't want to!

Hey missfine!!

I've seen ALL the points you make echoed time and time again! The scale actually HELPS me, but to many it's like a mood control knob.. it says a certain reading and you either feel good or bad... without anything else happening in your life.. what's with that??

I've also found that sometimes my shape is changing even when the weight isn't, so I'm looking better at the same weight by trading fat for muscle.

Regarding getting at or near goal and feeling worse about how you look.. sheesh.. I hope it doesn't make you think you're not special, but I've seen that MANY times and have had some of that myself.

For me, I KNEW I had lost weight and KNEW that i looked better (I kept my old shorts to PROVE it), and yet when I looked in the mirror I said "I'm at goal.. and LOOK at all that fat around my belly!!". I think when I was big I just didn't pay as much attention, but now that I'm a bit more focused on my shape and my weight, I know EXACTLY where every extra pound is. I also realize that at THIS point, I'm gonna have to combine exercise and eating right to "move" those lbs from my stomach to chest muscle. I'm usually very good with one or the other. I'm still having a bit of a rough time doing both!

Take care and good luck!! I've met goal, and I know you will too!! Then you can join me in "maintenance madness" and we'll maintain forever!! at least that's the theory!!

Mike

Thanks alot. I was starting to feel my fear of the scales was an unhealthy problem! Thanks for the support and Daddio- congratualtions on loosing a whopping 60 pounds!
jules

I definitely am with you on the scale issue! I hate it and haven't weighed myself in almost a year.
By the way, exercising helps a tremendous lot with the feeling like a "fat, sluggish pig."

Hi Missfine...I have to tell you I also had to choose between drinking and the WOE. It was a very hard choice that had to be made. I no longer get to go out with my friends and join in happy hour the way I used to every week and weekend but it has made a tremendous difference in my weight loss efforts.I was getting more and more depressed it had been over 2 weeks and I was doing induction strictly (excpt I was stillhaving drinks) and I so little results then 3 weeks ago I had to make the choice either drink and stay a fat pig and accept it or stop and be and feel healthier and drop this discusting fat....well obviously I chose the 2nd choice. So, first thing I got rid of my scale....and then my alcohol I started going by the book and finally last night I got the nerve to weigh in (not at home) and I had lost 9 pounds. I cannot begin to say how worth it I feel like it was....I haven't had a drink in 22 days and with that I have even given up smoking cig. Which is a double victory since I always smoked when I had drinks, now that I don't have drinks I don't ever want cig. so two birds with one stone...... I'm sure everyone has at least one thing like this that they have to overcome to accomplish and meet thier goals and some people will have alot easier time than others but for me this was no easy quest and I am very proud of myself and you should be to. I was happy to see your post because I didn't feel so alone in this I know the shoes you are standing in. Hang in there and good luck.

Congratulations on not having a drink in 22 days.

I know what you mean about still feeling fat. I have lost almost 50 lbs but I can barely tell when I look in the mirror. Sure, I have the scale and smaller clothes to prove it, but one day I'd like to just look at myself and think "finally, I am thin." Lately I've been worried that since 50 lbs hasn't made much of a difference, maybe I will feel the same after losing another 30 and reaching goal. I have to say that I will be very disappointed if I reach goal and still feel fat all the time. I'm trying to lose weight not only to be healthier and look better to others, but also to be happy with the way I look.
I think part of it is just general self-misconceptions. My sister, who weighs about 130, is constantly asking me if her clothes make her look fat (believe me, she is NOT fat). But she sees it that way. I think you need to learn to trust your friends more than what you see in the mirror.

The other day, I was in a room with a mirror on one wall, to make it look bigger. I didn't realize it was only a mirror, and when I turned around, I thought "that girl is skinny". Then I realized I was seeing my own reflection! I KNOW I would not have had that thought if I just tried to look at myself. I guess the point of all of this is to trust "outside" indicators, like clothes, pictures, and friends to tell you how good you look. Even on days YOU feel fat, they won't see it that way. One day (hopefully) your mental self-image will catch up to what everyone else sees.

Sorry for the long post, but I've been thinking a lot about this lately!

p.s. Congrats on giving up drinking, I am working on that but its so hard!

Hey Lilli--almost a year!! actually that makes me feel heaps better- I can stick to the diet-the idea of not having to weigh myself makes this WOL alot more appealing. Just think you could be really near or past goal. If you do weigh yourself I'd be interested to knowthe results. I am going to bite the bullet and do it next week. Just to reasure myself that I am loosing at all. Then I shall probaly just leave it for as long as possible like you. I think I have lost weight.Everything feels nice and loose!!
Tiff, very brave of you to give up alcohol and smoking together. Well done on the 22 days- I have never gone without it for longer than 2 weeks!!! I really hope it doesnt come to this for me as I would find it very very hard. But if need must I hope I am able to accept the score as you have!!!

I'm not physically thin - yet. I'm thinner and I feel better. I still have a long way to go. I was one of these 125 pound blonde chicks with a thing for New Wave in high school (I'm showing my age - Duran, Duran anyone?) and it is highly frustrating to see what has become of me. I used to play tennis several times a week. Now, I'm winded climbing two flights of stairs. UGH! Well, I've ditched all ideas about that girl and decided to enjoy being "this" chick now - DH and DD to boot. I still have my moments though. I do want to find a tennis partner and at least go hit around for an hour a couple times a week. That would help. I'd burn it off and run it off and feel better. My knees would hurt for a while and I'd be sore for a bit but that's because I didn't bother to take care of myself for the past - how long now? I don't know. Being thin is a state of mind, too. And thin is a rather unquantifiable term. What is thin to one person is not to another - we're just programmed by the what the advertisers want us to see as "thin". DH thinks I'm cute...DD (who is pitching an Academy Award winning fit at the moment) loves me no matter what. I can quantify what "thin" means to me - I'd like my husband to be able to carry me across the threshold of our home on our 10th wedding anniversary (3 more years). Cheers!

P.S. Daddio - love that song - and I hope you are dancing!!