**bump**
I agree, Kathleen. This could be a “best of” sticky in the emotional eating forum.

This is a beautiful thread. The letters are funny and heartfelt and have given me so much to think about. I wonder where many of the writers from 10 years ago are today. And I wonder what others would say.

My turn

Dear fat,
I really do want to thank you for the messages you’ve been trying to send me my whole adult life. I couldn’t see that you were talking to me. I never really understood you as you tried to say: “You’re so unhappy! You’re not healthy! Those foods aren’t helping you, listen to me!” Even though I pride myself on listening, I wasn’t listening to you...I should say, to us, to my body, of which you are a part.

Each time I refused to look closely at my life and consider taking healthy action — the repression of my self and needs; the very wrong relationship; the ill-fitting, stressful job; the depression and helpless sense that I didn’t deserve to live the life I wanted and the illnesses that followed; the fears and stress and loneliness as a single parent — you tried to tell me. With every pound you got louder, more emphatic: “This life isn’t working,” you said. “See? See?”

I should have listened. I’m trying to listen now. I see that the cravings and binges start with the unhappiness or stress That I (me! Not you) refuse to look at, which then drive all those chemical processes that create more cravings, and more hunger and need that can’t really be filled. And you, fat, try to help—mopping up the sugar and carbs, and showing me as strongly as you can with every pound that something in my life isn’t working.

The way you respond to this way of eating, the way you are less hysterically rising up in my life, the way you slowly and gracefully are giving way is admirable. I’m learning so much about taking care of myself and recogniizing the things I need to adjust in my life. I’m learning more responsibility for my happiness, for my stress, for my needs. I’m learning about eating right so that your voice is calmer, quieter, and I try to listen more carefully.

You remain with me, my early warning system that things aren’t right in my life, as long as I keep paying attention. It’s fine for you to stay quiet and soft-voiced now fat. I think I’ve got this.