This time it's the truth though. Years back I lost so much weight doing low carb and got down to 267 pounds. Then I went off, developed a back injury, thyroid problem, depression... bam.. went all the way up to 508 pounds in 2016. Been yo-yo-ing around the 480 mark until this past November 21st. This morning I weighed myself for the first time and I was 457.6.

Things got so bad. I saw myself at my worst and I am still there. Despite back pain so bad I can't stand for literally any periods of time and problems with edema and my legs my other blood tests came back OK.

I really want, or should I say NEED to do this. I don't have a choice. I really feel like if I don't - I won't live much longer. I don't want to leave my wife and 2 little girls without a dad. My greatest fear is not to be able to be there for them and provide for them because I chose food over them, which, it feels like I've done all these years. I'm still working on that depression thing. I often feel hopeless, useless and just like I am going to die at any time and leave them and it kills me to even look at them sometimes because of how I screwed myself up so bad..

I am on levothyroxine working on getting my levels normal as they were/are extremely high and I have been doing low carb by the book since 11/21. Not snacking on anything. With me its one thing leads to another.. a day off turns into a month turns into a year.. you know how it happens.. So being able to do this for the past 2 weeks so 'well' is a big thing for me. I can't count on all my fingers and toes how many times I had to restart.

Thank you for letting me vent and re-introduce myself. I enjoy reading these forums because we're all in the same boat and so many of you are doing great.. Thank you for the inspiration..