Speaking philosophically here…I was about 40, and confused as "what does that mean?" as far as behavior, the way the world expects you to behave at 40, etc...a group of us women were meeting at my favorite hippie friend's house..she was always doing the coolest stuff way ahead of all of us..she got "Rolfed", used tinctures, walked on fire, studied weird nutrition and spiritual soul stuff..a very leading edge chick.

My friend shared the most amazing concept: LOOKING FORWARD TO BEING OLD…..she said she truly wanted to be like HER older friend who she considered old and wise. And she described how freeing it was to not be "on parade" for men's approval, and happy to be ignored by clueless guys just following their dicks, and finally able to do and say as you like because whose going to stop you? I LOVED this idea, and it has stuck with me. ( she was happily married, and not a 'man hater'..but he wasn't a joe football either)

What I recall disliking back then was the pressure at <40 to reproduce, and constantly be asked when I was going to have kids FINALLY stopped around 40.. if someone did bring it up I'd just say " What? I'm 40..get real!" and they shut up. [ok I've had a 25 year reprieve, NOW people ask about my [non-existant] grandkids!! grrrrrr]

So we discussed how some women are so tied to their 'beauty" they are fully ravaged as wrinkles show up, they actually bemoan themselves as worthless now, others layer on more and more makeup. Some dress like a 20 year old, and shop at Forever 21..but, everybody 'sees' that woman first as pathetic.

(Sofia Vergara a perfect combo of bombshell and comedienne said "she would put cement around her eyes if it stopped wrinkles and aging!) She is desperate to keep that youth..and yet there is a very stupid commercial on dandruff shampoo with her and her REAL 23 yr old son…bizarre..MEN dont want to think she;s that old! or a mom! young men don't care... they chase 20 yr olds, and women? why do we care? we can't identify, she's the least "mom looking" person on TV.)

I once learned MOST women keep the same hairstyles they wore in their sr year of High School, (my mom's generation sure did) and makeup style too…Now we see lots of ladies…boomers..with long hair and never trimmed, or worn up, almost the clinging to the "ironed hair" days. I swore I'd chop mine off at age 50 to a bob, but over time I left it grow, so maybe I am one of those women myself...

OTOH the most gorgeous woman I've seen in her late 60s was in a museum in SF…she was wearing a gauze skirt with elephants marching along the bottom, back tights underneath, and I remember she had naturally grey hair, and it was braided all the way down her back with a silver clasp…she truly OWNED her look, not like a kid, not silly, just sailing along as herself…basically she looked like she lived elsewhere and had returned to the states…. I admired her 'look'. maybe she was a total flake, but I didn't get that from her 'aura'.

Do ANY of you have positive images of being older?