I don't know if this is possible for you but you might consider giving yourself a huge reality check and taking a walk through a nursing home. Many, many of the people there are there because they have behavior related illness (lung cancer and diabetes etc). I wonder if you had any idea what a living hell it is to die of diabetes in one of those places what impact it might have on your motivation. Some of these people are literally decaying from the toes up. Most suffer daily indignities that I don't even know you'd want me to go in to. Suffice it say that the people who will be wiping your butt are not always caring medical professionals but rather the only poor saps they can get to do the job for just a buck or so over minimum wage. They usually don't last long in the job and every few weeks you have to deal with anther batch of newbies rolling you around or propping you up on the toilet. Sorry to be so graphic, but seeing this really helped me to recognize that I had to take another path in my life or was going to end up like that.

Heather