the only thing I can think of for your situation would be to look into pilates. (this seems to be something I keep repeating)
To me, because I find it hard to build, the more muscle I can get the better, but if you don't like how you look with more muscle then go with pilates... or similar type exercises. They won't cause you to bulk, but they will keep you strong and supple.
Your body type may not allow you to have a tiny waist in comparison to your hips, but you can be trim. You can tell if you're a tiny waist candidate by checking how many inches there are between your last rib and your hip bone, if there is not a lot of space you will never have a tiny cinched waist. This is not to be pessimistic, but so that you can set realistic goals for your own body.

Meg