Well Here It Is;

I lost the great battle over fear and pain.I was at walmart on thursday and almost passed out. I was having trouble seeing (stars in front of my eyes ) and my stomache was cramping up , headache , etc. The eyesight thing was the worst though. I knew I would experience some withdrawal symptoms ....but i guess I was ill prepared for how bad they would actually be. I feel so defeated So now I either start over or I stay fat. I want to start over ........but don't want to fail again. I don't mind the foods i have to eat, I don't mind the water or any of it. My eyes are my life and that scared me. I guess I just gotta get through the first week and i'll be on my way. This is very depressing. Can't sugar coat it , can't denie it I failed myself. I do believe in my quote and am going to try desperately for this day to help lead me to many fitter leaner and happier days in my future. I'll hold off on the healthier days till i'm through the first week.


Marie