I think that its all about how you mentally project yourself. There are a lot of overweight people out there who have loving partners. They have confidence and don't hide themselves. They aren't obsessed about their weight.

I think the media and magazines have a lot to answer for in making people feel guilty about not fitting in to that perfect size ten. Is it really worth the mental anguish and the suffering of your ego and relationships to constantly bombard yourself with negative throughts just because you don't fit into someones preconcieved idea of what the perfect women should look like or aspire to.
If you want to fit into a size ten you should stop and look at yourself before. If you are doing it because you feel it will make you loved by others then your living in a dream world. People are attracted to the person you are, not just the package.

If your finding it difficult to function in a relationship you should be looking at handling this before you pile on a guilt trip about your weight as well. Why do you find it difficult, why do people treat you differently. its probably becuase your shrinking away from people believing there thinking negative things about you.

The thing writing and drawing pig faces on cups and so forth is that your putting yourself down. Have you ever seen a plant thrive on darkness and no nutrients. Humans have to have a possitive influence to move them. Motivation etc.

You should try and push your throughts into a possitive outlook. So what if you eat a cream cake. Is it the end of the world? Did someone die because of it? Why the guilt trip.

If you want the cream cake eat it, but realise that if you want to lose weight its not going to lose itself. Start a real simple exercise plan.

I started by just dancing to some music ten minutes a day. And building it up from there. People treated me differently not because I was fitter but because my mental outlook on life was more possitive.