Hi jjoyb;

"Mousesmom, speaking as a former child from an unhappy marriage, I think it is worse for many children to stay in an unhappy relationship just for the child. I knew my mom was unhappy. My sisters and brother knew. In our case, she never told him she was unhappy, and he never noticed. She ended up developing some bad behaviors in both us and herself by not leaving or speaking up.

I am the product of an unhappy marriage myself so that's probably where I learned to say nothing. My parents barely spoke to each other for years and there was always an underlying hostility. They are both happier now that they are divorced (several years now), but they sure wasted a lot of years.

My daughter is aware of how things are. My SO has been told several times that I'm not happy with how things are but the next day it's business as usual. Maybe I will suggest counselling again.

Thanks for your perspective.

Julie