Ladies and gentlemen of the low-carb kingdom:
Good morning. I'm the brain-numb author of the "Atkins Schmatkins" column that was recently posted to this wonderful forum by a gentleman who, I'm assuming, very unironically calls himself "gotbeer." I was recently told by a friend to check this thread out because of the hilarious attacks that were made as to my character, my knowledge of my subjects, my motives for writing this particular piece, etc. Before I go further, let's all give all praise to Atkins. First of all, as I write this, i'm ingesting a delicious Kelloggs Pop Tart (75 grams total carbs). But that's not important right now. Rather, I'd like to simply say: thank you for reading my obscure little column and giving me yet another idea to write about — the angst-ridden low-carber. Praise be to Atkins. And by the way, at 6'5'', 220 lbs, there are no "other issues" at work here as some have suggested. I was just airing out a grievance I have about this little fad (and that's exactly what it is) and, apparently, I've struck a nerve. Praise be to Atkins. Lovely. I welcome your retorts. Please, let the games begin. I'm off to eat a blooming onion.
Yours in The Zone,
Jack A. Buehrer
Gannett News Service
jbuehrer~fremont.gannett.com

ps. You were right, however ... the media is 100% wrong 99% of the time. And believe me, I'm well aware how "lucky" I am to get paid for this as someone seemed to doubt.