First, I didn't enjoy being separated from my hisband. I know that many military spouses don't work. We decided as a couple it would be better for us in the long run for me to continue to work at a job that would pay me for what I do instead of trying to kill myself at a low paying job with no job satisfaction and bring that frustration home where I would not even have anyone to "vent" to, because at that time FFGs didn't even have phones. I love my husband, and I love to be with him, but I promised support and I didn't mean just for the first year.

I am not going to argue the base housing issue. I've seen it all over and never heard anyone say they were forced into it. It is always a choice. And in many places you have to wait to get in.

My husband had a bankruptsy -- still on his credit -- and still managed to swing a much larger loan than we would ever need. And no, he is not an officer. He enlisted as an E-1 just like most of your spouses did. Yes, I agree that life is a far cry better for most of them.

I hope that your husband does double his pay when he gets out. I really do. I think everyone that serves even a short time deserves to be very successful outside. But I am going to tell you that I know 4 separate instances where friends of ours quit their enlistments for civilian jobs with better pay in the same field of work. In 3 cases it was for more than twice the pay. In two of those cases the job lasted only a single year and now those families are trying to subsist on less than the base military pay was. Those 2 families are truly hurting and none of the 4 is still in the job 5 years later. I can honestly say that to the best of my knowledge I have never met anyone that I know served more than 8 years that got out instead of retireing and in happy about the decision now. I am not saying that it cannot happen, but we are very active in the VFW and the community, and I just don't see it.

I don't call my husband every day either. I hear enough of his stories about the wives that do that I would never need another deterrent. Again though, I was on my own long enough before we married that I try to work my problems out before I call hubby.

My medical is FREE. I've been over it again and again on his LES. And I had an operation about 3 years ago that would have cost upwards of $100K in the civilian world and it cost me $12 and that was for meals. I do admit sometimes it takes me a while to get an appointment, and I am not always treated in the respectful manner that I have come to expect from paying for those visits before I became a "dependent." But, you know, I have found that a calm phone call placed to the correct person usually results in much better treatment going forward. And before everyone gets upset that I complain, I am about 3 times as likely to call and compliment on favorable treatment. I have even had personnel stop me to thank me because my comments have been added to their personnel folder and apparently that looks really good when they are up for board. Also, when I was referred out, and it was because my doctor was sent to Kuwait, Tricare took care of everything. There was no co-pay or deductible. If I were you I would fight that and get my money back. One thing I have not been in this life is medically lucky. I average avisit every 2 weeks. And not for minor illness. Tumors, inner ear malfunction, incredible headaches that they cannot pinpoint, bulging disks, detaching retinas. Big ticket items.

I think all commissaries must add that 5% on. Here they call it an "upcharge" but skinless boneless chicken breast at $1.09 a pound + 5% is still a lot cheaper than the cheapest grocery by me which charges $2.69 per pound. $2 a box for cereal is cheaper too. By about $2.50 a box. I cannot believe that cereal costs more than meat!!!! Just amazing.

Yes, I have met some people who have not had a great time of it. But they still don't spend a huge amount of time complaining about it, just certain experiences. And, no we don't have it all. Like I say, I work a lot of hours at a job that is not always rewarding. But that is because we want to have it all. And unlike many people, we are willing to work for it. We have a list of the things that we want and we know what it is going to take to get it.

Just an example....... We have some friends who have been in the Navy for the exact length of time that we have. The spouse works part time at a beer bar for a couple dollars and some meager tips. Yet their house cost twice as much as ours, and they have 2 brand new full size SUV,s and a full size sedan, and a brand new boat. (We drive compact cars, not quite at the bottom of the line, but close and we have no good toys) I complain to my hubby (yes I know very petty of me, but I am human) about how can they do that when we shoud be way ahead of them. He looks at me and sighs, and then tells me that they are mortgaged to the hilt and they are not putting anything away for their future. Apparently when they have a flat tire they have to use a line of credit against their house to pay the "unexpected expense." It still does not seem fair (I guess I am more into instant gratification than I thought...lol) but I guess I understand too. Work hard then play hard.

I would like to set the record straight, if the comment about the public thinking the military has it all was directed at me you were way off. I don't think that being separated from the part of you that makes you whole is having it all. Neither do I think that all the worry about where they are and when or if they are coming home is having it all. But I do think that a career in the military can be a means to an end, and that some people would do nothing else -- maybe even for no pay. I have heard way too many stories about 18 year old kids who join because they never had a pair of shoes before or because there isn't enough food for all the younger kids at home. I think that in the grand scheme of things, yes for the risk that they subject themselves to the pay and benefits could be better. But for some people it is about more than money.

I suppose it all depends on the angle that you choose to look at it.

Happy Tuesday everyone.