I was in your situation 3 years ago. I was in no shape at all.
I believe you are starting with weights which are too heavy for you... you should pick a weight which you can do a first set of at least 15 reps with good form, and stick to this weight for a couple of weeks, just to get the form burnd into your brain (bad habits are harder to break).

when I started I was doing the following:
upper body - 3 sets of 12-15 reps:
- Chest (dumbbell press, or flys)
- Shoulders (front or lat raises)
- bicepts (concentration curls or cable)
- Tricepts (cable pushdown)
- upper back (one arm dumbbell row)
- crunches and lower back hyper extentions..


this is the basic. Since you dont have a spotter, try to use cable as much as you can.. it is safer.
and as someone here said, use www.exrx.net for ideas..