I have the same experienced as Nancy -- you can't make anyone eat differently than they are willing or able to eat. I know that people were frustrated with me for decades because I wouldn't/couldn't cut calories and lose weight, but I was really unable to do it. Every time I went on Weight Watchers or a similar low calorie diet, I slipped up after a couple of weeks. It wasn't until I found low carbing that I was able to stick to an eating plan that improved my health. Atkins works for me, I can stick to it because it doesn't require any "willpower," it just seems natural, but I know that it is much more difficult for some people. For whatever reason, it isn't as easy for some of our loved ones and I think that they will have to, on their own, find what works for them when they are ready (and desperate) enough to do so. It's hard to watch someone we love damaging their health, but those of us in the TDC subjected our loved ones to watching us damage our health for years, so I think we have to be a little understanding. I know that many times over the years my husband had to bite his tongue not to say something about what I was eating, and I am very grateful to him that he did so.

My husband is not overweight, but he has high cholesterol that has not been controlled by drugs and high blood pressure that is controlled by drugs. I would love to see him more seriously low carb, and he has cut out a lot of the sugared sodas and other junk her was eating including most transfats, but that has been about as far as he can go. He saw how much my blood test results improved after a year of low carbing, but for whatever reason he is just not ready to make that transition yet.

When I was having a lot of trouble with my teenage son a couple of years ago (related to schoolwork -- not eating), we met with a family social worker who told my husband and I that our highest priority should be maintaining a household where the members could feel loved and supported, not judged for inadequacies over which they have little or no control. Otherwise, he said, our son would totally stop communicating with us as he went through adolescence and that would lead to a lot bigger problems down the road. I think the advice he gave us with regard to not pressuring our son to do better in school than he was able to do, also applies to pressuring family members about the way they eat. Frustrating as it is to watch them injure themselves, in my opinion it does no good to compound that problem by trying to pressure them and creating a household that people don't want to come home to. I decided long ago that I would lead by example and if anyone wanted to follow my example I would be supportive, but I wouldn't nag them into doing so.