My shrink was flippant, in a studied way. When I described all the stresses in my life now --

• my boss restricting my job duties so much that it would be easy to lay me off (I work for a co. that laid more than 10,000 people in 2002)
• an internal job interview coming up where the hiring manager has clearly stated that I'll need to convince her that I can acquire knowledge in the client's business rapidly
• the difficulty of finding other jobs in this economy
• my mom suddenly and quickly losing her vision due to retinitis pigmentosa (RP)
• my new rental property that's sitting empty, draining my cash
• my girlfriend's remaining 5 months in school before she can get a job in her new field (her old field imploded with the dot.com bust), and the fact that her extended benefits run out in August

he said, "Aren't you entitled to be anxious?"

I replied, "But I had much the same stressors during the three months I was losing weight, and I wasn't anxious nearly to this degree. Something biochemical is going on."

He said, "Gee, I don't know."

If I could get another shrink, I now have reason to. But psychiatrists who accept both my insurance and new patients are virtually non-existent in my area now.

At least until my interview, I can focus on preparing for it, and give a focus to my energies, which lessens the anxiety somewhat.

The only other difference in my routine lately has been switching from my physical therapist's exercise studio to my home gym and interacting with a new trainer. That's been wholly positive (except for discovering the limits of my lower body's flexibility).

I'm going to take a salivary cortisol test. If I come out high (what do you think the odds are?), that may be part of the explanation.