Sabotage
 

I just have to tell you.....
Last evening my husband gave me a bowl of warm dessert. I noticed there was a streak of chocolate in the middle and ate a bit with the rest of the dessert. I said "That chocolate does not taste nice". He said "That was chocolate that you threw in the rubbish bin because you didn't want it in the house because you would only eat it". I am soooooooo cranky and angry that someone would do that to me. It seems that he wants me overweight :cry:

:idea: It would be interesting for others to share their stories about sabotage....

My best to everyone,
Tubby Tummy.

Wow, if this diet (or WOL) is hard for you. Your husband is not helping.
I would ask, WHY did you give me something that I can't have. Are you trying to "kill me" If you tell him that you think that this WOL will help you live to see your children grow up, ask him to show you studies that say it is bad for you. I don't think he will find them.
You have to do what is wight for YOU
Not what is right for HIM.

Do what is right for you AND your kids.

that is an incredibly hurtful thing to do, and im sorry you had to deal with it. at first, i had difficulty eating out with friends for fear of looking silly, but luckily, they were supportive.
the only person who i am having difficulty with is my mother, who insists she follows Atkins as i do, (but seems to follow the plan only every other day). i have to deal weekly with her insisting that i can and should eat this sugar marinated meat, or this ice cream and pizza- that this food is only so many carbs when i KNOW it is more. i can understand your frustration.

My Goodness, T...how hurtful that is! It's clear that hubby is not on board with your goals...is there a way you could sit him down and give him the lecture of a lifetime??? And then ask directly for his help??

If he doesn't respond to that...the only thing left is for YOU to take complete control over everything you eat and prepare. Next time he hands you something, even if he means well, maybe you should politely refuse and tell him that you really need to stay true to your goals and not allow anything to betray your efforts...Maybe he'll get the message and start making you LC desserts!!

My BF used to bring home a slice of my favorite carrot cake just to surprise me! He really wanted to do my favorite thing - and truthfully, he never knew if I was on or off my plan - but when I WAS really trying to stay true, this was a major downfall. I had to just tell him to surprise me with non-food things...he's been pretty good about that. But he's never deliberately tried to cause me failure...that's something else...and it would make me MAD enough to sit him down and tell him what was up.

Good luck

I sympathize, too. Recently my own DH, who is usually very supportive,started making remarks about me "blowing your carbs, at least a LITTLE" in order to eat foods I don't want and are high-carb. This from a man who is 40-50 pounds overweight himself, but not motivated to do anything about it. That's OK, but leave me alone about my food choices-and that's just what I told him. :nono:

I said "Do you like how I look?" "OH, yes" he replied. I said, "well, then, let me be!" And he has. (I was a size 20, now down to 14, the size I was before I gained). Sometimes you just have to hit the nail on the head. :agree:

He sounds a bit insecure to me. Only he knows why the thought of a thinner you would threaten him. Maybe you should ask him if he wants you to be healthier and thinner? If he says yes, mention to him that his behaviors are not consistent with a yes reply. Chocolate is not a good food on any diet!!!

When I was in college, I drank too much beer and ate too much junk food. I gained weight and wanted to lose it. When I came home for the summer, my dad would jog with me and be supportive in my weight loss efforts. My mom was overweight and would make my favoite desserts when I was trying to lose weight. I asked her to to stop making the desserts and she got mad. One night she told me that I must really think that I'm special because I was losing weight. She stated that she was tired listening to it and about the miles my dad and I jogged. She was just jealous because she was overweight and unhappy about.

Angie

Thank you
 

Thank you very much for all your replies to my post. I appreciate your empathy and advice very much. This act of sabotage of my husbands, because it was so obvious, has enabled me to trust more my own experiences of his much more covert acts of sabotage. He is very very cunning.
My best to all of you and my admiration to those of you who are doing so well with weight loss.

omg..if my husband even JOKINGLY did something like that...he'd be sleeping on the back porch till my divorce lawyer showed up...

Really crappy...sorry for you

Of course it's worth considering his motivation, too...

...maybe he's worried that you'll be successful and look good (better than him) or good to others. Maybe he fears that you'll be successful and he'll "have to" give up some treats too. It's worth trying to understand the motivation so you can re-train him!

Donald :p

Maybe he wanted the chocolate in the house to eat himself and was angry you threw it and that left him with none?