Active Low-Carber Forums

Active Low-Carber Forums (http://forum.lowcarber.org/index.php)
-   Triple Digits Club (http://forum.lowcarber.org/forumdisplay.php?f=49)
-   -   do u disclose your actual weight to people? (http://forum.lowcarber.org/showthread.php?t=61222)

committed Sun, Sep-15-02 11:51

do u disclose your actual weight to people?
 
I never did, not for 48 years. About two years ago, my sister and I started being honest with each other. She was 'only' 40 pounds overweight.

Well, it felt so good to be honest with my sister, that I started telling people I am close to. Now I mention it to many people. Not total strangers on the street but if diet comes up . . . and it does, I come right out and report my high weight, my current weight and my goal weight.

It feels so good to be open. And my openness generates support that I would not otherwise have had.

I have also found that people who have never been 100+ pounds overweight don't really have any idea what a person 100+ or 150+ or 200+ etc really look like.

When I started telling people I weighed 300 (back when I did!), many people were surprised at my actual weight, they had thought I weighed much, muchless. Not that they gave it much thought but normal size folks who have always been normal sized folks just don't know what 300 pounds looks like on a 5'7" frame. Or whatever the weight/height ratio might be.

I have a 75 year old friend who is 5'8" and weighs about 180. She has more than one seriously debilitating disability. She can do no exercise. She beats herself up for being fat. I tell her that we don't know what other people weigh, that she is not all that fat for her age and height and health condition. We do so much damage to ourselves with self hatred.

I had another friend that I have not seen in fifteen years. I weighed about 240 when we were pals. She was a lot fatter than me so I concluded she weighed about 300. She slipped a couple of discs in her spine picking up a child at work. I took her to one of her doctor's appointments at a pain clinic. As they weighed her, I looked away, not wanting to invade her privacy but I caught a glimpse of the digital scale: 470. That's when I began to realize people don't know what 100+ overweight looks like.

I know many folks are ashamed of disclosing their real weight. This shame adds to our suffering, IMHO.

Just wanted to share how being truthful about my actual weight has set me free. Sunlight is the best disinfectant.

UtahKat Sun, Sep-15-02 12:09

Do You Disclo
 
WOW! You are so brave. I think I see what you mean- it took me a very long time to post my weights on another support group to which I belong, and I felt like a "hero" for the rest of the day, just for a bit of honesty that is natural to all slim people! Silly us, huh?

But no, although it is obvious to my husband and friends that I am fat, I don't think any of them have a clue HOW fat, and I'd just as soon keep it that way. I'm not ready for total honesty! Maybe when I weigh 160? :lol:

You are sooo right- most people don't know what someone 100, or 200 lbs overweight looks like, or what a tremendous variation in size/appearance there may be at the same weight, depending on height, bone structure and musculature. Us tall ones "get away with murder" - up to a point!

Somehow, revealing your true weight leaves you feeling vulnerable- and the general population, with ingrained predjudices against the overweight, is really not to be trusted with this info. Not yet, and not by me!
Hugs,
Kat

Shark01 Sun, Sep-15-02 13:43

For me it depends on the spirit with which the question was asked. If it's asked in a smart a** way, I'll say something like 598 lbs :rolleyes: If I feel it is asked in a legitimate way, I will tell the truth. But people seldom believe me. Even when I weighed over 400, people always assumed I was less than 300 because I have an athletic (football) looking build from years of weight training.

Talon Sun, Sep-15-02 13:51

It used to be mum's the word, but now that I have lost so much, I'll tell them where I started out, where I am now and exactly how much I have lost. I am just so proud of myself, I can't contain it.

Sherry B Sun, Sep-15-02 14:12

well not exactly
 
I remember being in a public place one time with my sister who is MUCH fatter than me, and I was talking about being a hundred pounds overweight. She was horrified and wanted me to keep my voice down.

I told her "Well come on, Rose it isn't like they can't tell just by looking at us".

She's much taller and heavier than me, so maybe she was afraid if people knew I was a hundred over they would figure out that she was even more than that. I'm not sure what her reasoning was, but I know I felt more comfortable with it than she did.

DWRolfe Sun, Sep-15-02 15:11

Not with everyone...
 
I tell my immediate support system...this forum, my partner, my sisters...

...otherwise I only share the number of pounds I've lost. Thus far, no one has asked for the actual weight I am at. Frankly, I don't think people would believe me anyway, as I look smaller than my 334lbs. I'm slim hipped and small butt. Maybe it's from lifting weighs in the past, genetics or years of learning how to dress with the illusion of being smaller than I am.

Interesting thread...thanks for posting everyone!

Donald :wave:

DarkLotus Sun, Sep-15-02 15:38

Yeah, I tell people all the time, as I get asked all the time. It doesn't bother me anymore, because I am DOING something about it. Not just whining "I'm fat!" and having another six pack. Before I started I wouldn't go near a scale, I was afraid to know just how much I weighed. So, now I am fine with telling people I weigh 255 pounds, hey it's better than 306!!! :D

Btw, I'm not so good at this, but everybody that's posted so far is doing great!!! I follow the progress of a few of you, even if I don't post in your jouranls. Wtg guys!!! :cheer:

UtahKat Sun, Sep-15-02 15:54

Do you disclose........
 
One thing that strikes me as funny about myself- and I sure others are like me too! I brag and crow and carry on about every damn pound I lose to anyone who will listen, but I won't tell my weight. Most folks are sensitive enough to know that is a "no-no" question. :blush:

But what is even sillier is the heavy burden we place on our friends! Think about it: we expect them to support our diets, and notice and praise every single pound we lose, every pair of pants fitting looser, but heaven forbid they should notice or say anything when the scale is going the other way!

This overweight stuff is such an emotional issue. When will I believe some of my own rhetoric about myself, that I do believe about other people- that our bodies are just temporary containers for our spirits?
Hugs,
Kat

upncomer Sun, Sep-15-02 18:03

Funny question...

I NEVER tell anyone (even my DH) how much I weigh, but, I ALWAYS tell everyone how much I have lost. Except for one time when I was at my doctor's office (DH always wants to go with me so he asks any questions I forget to ask). From my last visit I had lost 30lbs. DH was sitting in the room with me while the nurse was checking all of my particulars (temp, bp, etc.). Out loud, she exclaimed, "Wow, Doctor will be so pleased at how much you have lost - the last time you were here you weighed 292!" :eek:

Well, I immediately replied to the nurse, "will you SHUT UP!!!!" She looked at me, then at my DH (who was trying not to smile), and then realized what she had said in front of my DH. she got all red and apologized. I turned to my DH and said, "remember, that was my OLD weight!!" He has never said a word about that day!

Sherry B Sun, Sep-15-02 18:30

I used to be that way
 
with my husband. He is this tiny little thing that never gains a pound and can lose 5 or 10 in a couple of days without even trying. Eventually though it came out how much I weigh and I don't keep it secret anymore. It isn't that important. He loves me at any weight so why should I worry if he knows or not?

lesleyc Sun, Sep-15-02 18:39

My husband, a couple of close friends and this forum are the only ones that know my actual weight.

Originally my weight was such a secret even I didn't know what it was :p Telling myself was the first big step ;)

Now I readily tell people how much I have lost, and I would probably tell them what I actually weighed if anybody asked...but nobody does...I think for most people that is forbidden territory ;)

Lesley

Natrushka Sun, Sep-15-02 18:45

I remember when I told my boyfreind last year that I wanted to lose 50 more lbs - this after having lost about 30 already. He looked at me like I was insane. When I told him I weighed 240+ when I started out LCing he didn't believe me. Up until then he was the only person I had ever told (other than the members on this forum). He estimated I was about 185 (what a dear). I don't tell people now - even though I am close to being done with the 'loss' part - simply because it's not important to me and because they wouldn't believe me. I just tell them I went from a size 20 to a size ___ (fill in the blank).

When I do get to where I want to be I am going to post one of those before / after shots with "Guess the goal weight" just for laughs. I'd be surprized if anyone got remotely close.

Nat

lesleyc Sun, Sep-15-02 18:56

Nat,

I'm always picked at being 20lbs less than I am too. When I'm done I think I will be well above stated goal ;)

Don'tcha just love those rock hard thighs though ;)

L

Tari Mon, Sep-16-02 17:04

You guys are the only ones I'll tell. I'll tell how much I've lost, but not how much I weigh...I won't even tell my fiancee (and we're doing this together). He's very understanding about it, though.

suze_c Tue, Sep-17-02 09:25

People don't believe I weigh what I do
 
I use to have a problem with telling ppl my weight, like it was some big secret. When I got to 250#, I'd joke about weighing more than Mike Tyson or some linebackers...no one believed I weighed that much,because I'm pretty short, barely 5'4", carried my weight well,and I was more muscular then. Even now when I say my weight, I hear " you can't weigh THAT much", to which I reply,...why would I SAY I weigh that much if I don't? :daze: There's some silly ppl in this world!Well, the :baby: is trying to dissect my ponytail strand by strand,so I must close,she's 11 mo. old today! :) I was up to #310 2 days before I had her,then down to #270 TWO WEEKS after I had her,then somehow gained #45,which REALLY SUCKS!!! :thdown:


All times are GMT -6. The time now is 21:11.

Copyright © 2000-2024 Active Low-Carber Forums @ forum.lowcarber.org
Powered by: vBulletin, Copyright ©2000 - 2024, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.