Are your family and friends treating you differently?
 

I use to think that my sister in law was a very good friend. Now that I have lost weight and she is a couple of pounds heavier than me she doesn't have much to do with me anymore. My other sister in law asked her to go to the gym after Thanksgiving to work out. I her my old friend say "yeah, I don't want to be the fat one".

I am glad that I heard it strait from the horses mouth. It only make me try harder.... Renee, this pounds for you!!

Kat

My best friend of 17 years barely talks to me now. She has declared Atkins doesn't work and that no one (me?) can live forever without carbs. She tried LCing for about 10 days after I lost my first 15 pounds. She has a lot more than me to lose. I told her to read the book but she didn't. Just went to Wal-Mart and bought every frankenfood on the market. Spent a bundle so her first complaint was that low carb was way too expensive. Next, the food was terrible. She was trying to eat a "normal" diet. Fake pasta, fake chips, stuff I've never tried to this day. Quit because she was sooo tired. Anyway, she said she could never live like "that". She also declared that she MUST have a desert when she goes out. Everyone needs a treat now and then. (Which I have a couple of times a week - homemade cookies, sf candy or lc ice cream)

Barely talks to me now and I NEVER mention my weight loss or what we eat. Still, she is avoiding me. Never believed me back in May when I told her to read the book and give this woe a chance. I can go out and not NEED or even desire a desert. I am sitting next to a gigantic bowl of candy, lots of Dove and Perguina, that my officemate brought in. Nothing. No drool coming out of my mouth. I would have made myself sick by now eating this candy before I started LCing. Just like I did at Easter, which is what convinced me I was out of control and needed to stop being a carb junkie. Well, you folks believe me even if she doesn't.

I sure do miss her. :cry: This is her problem though, not mine.

There's nothing thats more of a downer than negative vibes like these. It really bugs me that people can be so closed minded about other wol's.

If they can't see past their own noses, we're better off being without them.

I had a long term friend get real wierd about my weightloss. She got real grouchy at work when I got tons of attention and compliments.I asked what was up and she seemed shocked I asked and said she was happy for me. She then talked negatively about it behind my back. Saying I thought I was so hot. Hey, hold on I was hot at 207 according to DH. I was very hurt.
Another friend asked me to point out any friend she had that was a size 6 like her. I was it, just me. All her friends were heavy. I was competition! How disgusting. Now that I have regained she is real friendly again. No thanks!

I'm glad to hear all of you share some of these types of stories--It's nice to know that I'm not the only one who has lost friends along with the weight! One of my best friends completely stopped calling me and when I see her at family gatherings, she ignores me and tries to not talk to me very much. It's so funny, because as I continue to slim down, she seems to be moving the the opposite direction, I think she gains a pound for every pound I lose, but of course she would never be able to live on this WOE (Quote: "I'm hispanic and I can't live without rice, beans and tortillas") Whatever.

Thanks everyone for sharing your stories with me. It really helped..

Kat

yup, I have a friend at work that everytime she sees me it's "hey skinny". But it isn't said in a nice way and everyone in the room turns to look at me. Now at 200 Plus Iam no where near skinny. Its one of those reverse compliment things. im sure shes talking stuff behind my back.


Gabrielle

Too funny
 

I use to say the same thing about rice and beans. I'm hispanic and I'm living just fine without it all. Don't even crave the rice and beans anymore.




On another note, everyone in my family is being real supportive :thup: except for one Aunt. :nono: She goes, I don't mean to scare you but I've heard from friends doing the Atkins diet that it doesn't work and 2 people I know have gotten heart attacks from it.

She mad me so mad. I told her maybe it's cause they didn't do the Atkins right and they kept cheating and gave themselves a freaking heart attack.

But then again, this one Aunt in particular was the one always calling me FAT when I was younger. :cry: So I don't expect any support from her to begin with. I wasn't even FAT damn it, I was thin growing up (just see my 1992 picture on the gallery) but since she was freaking Calista Flockheart :lol: then anybody a pound heavier than her to her was FAT!

Funny thing is, she's not all that skinny anymore. :p After her son was born 7 years ago she started to gain. After all her talk of, I'm gonna exercise and lose my pregnancy weight, I'm not gonna do what you did and let myself get FAT.
Yeah well, TAKE A LOOK IN THE MIRROR GIRLIE CAUSE NOW YOUR WALKING IN MY SHOES. :lol:

Ok, I vented, that feels better. :)

Take care ya'll,

Lily

My DH was always telling me I looked wonderful, even at my heaviest while pregnant (260), but now that I've lost so much I find he's much more attentive, even going as far as picking me up, LOL. I now weigh 3 pounds more than him, I am proud of that. He's always been a little guy at 5'7", and not heavy, just muscular. I do notice being treated somewhat differently by his side of the family though, almost as if they're afraid to talk to me. I'm sure as they all get used to my new figure, they'll come around again. It's sad to see how some people get mad (especially friends) at everyone's weightloss. You'd think they'd be happy for us?

:)melissa

We have to be careful here... This can go both ways.

I had a good friends (who always weighed less than me anyway) who went on Weight Watchers and dropped 60lbs. He did a great job, and I made a conscious effort to be supportive and positive about the experience. Apparently they had a discussion much like this one in WW, so he was on the lookout for friends sabotaging him. For instance, one time he mentioned to me he was having some stomach pains, so I suggested he might want to mention it to his doctor, he blew up at me accusing me of sabotaging his weight loss! I didn't even mention it!

We are still friends, but we don't talk nearly as much as we use to... And now I have to tiptoe around subjects. It's not like it use to be.

--nw

I get a boatload of compliments every day. I have seen a few of my close friends start acting weird about me now. Actually Ive been called a bitch here and there. Well I think I was a bitch 50 pounds ago, no difference now!

It's sad when you change and not everyone else does. But what can you do? If being miserable makes THEM happy, they deserve to lose a friend.

It's really sad to hear about friends turning on someone who is trying to make their own life better. I don't have any friends because I am a housewife who never gets out of the house except on weekends and then it is time to visit my mother and sisters. They are all I need and they are really supportive of my efforts this time.

I lost my best friend in 1996 to heart problems. I really miss her and I have never had the desire to replace her with someone else. I would like to think she would have supported me in this especially since it could have helped her if she had known what would happen and started low-carbing in time. I know I left it a little late to start this diet but better late than never and it really scares me what happened to her so since her death I have tried several different diets hoping it didn't happen to me.

That summer it seemed she was just fine. By fall she was feeling tired all the time and tests were being done to figure out what was wrong. She really failed the stress test big time. She opted to wait to have the heart cath done after Christmas so it was scheduled for January 4, 1996 which was her 38th birthday. As her mother and I waited for the heart cath to be done the doctor came in to tell us she had a heart attack on the table and would be admitted CICU. He went on to describe what happened during the heart cath. He described a "lovely tree trunk but once he left the trunk area there was...NOTHING!" Those were his exact words. He said it should have branched out but she had nothing but a stump and nothing would help her except a heart transplant.

She never had a chance. She was in and out of the hospital from then on. She wasn't rich so she had to get in line to receive a transplant but she never got past the paperwork. She died on February 17, 1996.

I had the same eating habits that she did so I knew that could easily happen to me. To my own shame I did very little about it until I reached the age of 38 two years ago. For some reason reaching the age of her death myself was my own turning point. I plan to stick with this WOE for the rest of my life and I would like to think she agrees with what I'm doing and would not have turned against me for it. You people with friends like that don't need them. Find someone who likes you for yourself and who can live with your way of life.

Friskyroo - I'm so sorry about your friend. I know how hard it's been the last few months with my friend avoiding me. I can't imagine her being gone. I'm glad you have your family. My family is the best too.

Except for my best friend, everyone else has been so supportive. Family, co-workers, neighbors. Got together with my college roommate and she emailed the college gang to tell them how great I looked. :yay: We're getting together in January and I'm really excited since they all sent positive emails after hearing from my roommate. We try to get together twice a year . Last time was before I began this woe. I did let everyone know I was starting but haven't mentioned anything about my weight since the beginning of the summer. Seems strange to toot your own horn. Plus, of the 7 of us, only two gained weight since school. Five are the same weight as in college. That must be some sort of record! I always hid in the back when we took pictures, like that would keep anyone from noticing how huge I was next to these skinny folks. (None of them make any sort of issue about eating or weight. It was totally MY problem with MY weight. They aren't thin people who make it an issue to be thin, they just never gained and never judged me because I did. The best kind of friends. Sure wish we lived closer.)

Seems people with weight to lose themselves have a harder time being supportive of us. I used to be so jealous when someone lost weight because I wanted to be them (without giving up my carb loaded goodies of course). I remember, it isn't easy being on the other side. Hopefully my best friend will stop making my weight an issue in the friendship and we can get back on track. If I want to talk LC, I have you folk. I need her to talk kids, home, work, pets, all the rest of the world. I'll give her a call tonight and maybe talking over Chirstmas plans can get us back on track!