Your opinion, please
 

Maybe I should have made this a poll. I'm just curious about everyone's feelings concerning support from family and friends. Do you think the people around us should do everything they can to support our way of life, even if that means changing their ways to accomodate us? Or do you think we're responsible for ourselves and need to adapt? There's no right or wrong answers. I'd just like to know your opinion. Thanks!
Leigh

I think that my friends and family should be supportive of me, and not attempt to sabatoge my diet - however, I don't believe they should have to alter their lives for my lifestyle choices. it is my responsibility as a full grown adult to choose what food enters my mouth,and it is up to me to be strong enough to set my priorities and say no. I would never tell my family they have to eat low carb becuase I do, just as I won't eat high carb for them. That said, it is damn hard without support! I am lucky enough to have a good friend following the same path, so it is much easier for me. Unfortunatly my familyis very against this way of life.

Well... lemme just say that when I decided to get clean from sugar and refined carbs I told DH that there was no way in heck I was having them in the house. I was sick of bingeing and I was on my way to b/p unless I really got help. He agreed and has been my best support. Fortunately, we both follow PP now. :D

I've been very honest with friends and family, and aside from a few, they have been so supportive! They always ask me what they can make for dinner if I am visiting or what restaurant I'd like to go to. It's been wonderful and I try to return the favor for them.

I think that support is vital--and part of that support is (for me) having a partner who understands the humilating truth that I have a serious problem.

Telling my fiance that I would eat the food if it was in the house was probably the most humilating thing I've ever done. I'm 24 years old and I had to admit that I am not capable of controling what I put in my mouth. Thinking about it makes me want to cry. But it's the truth, and nothing I say changes it. I eat sugar like the drug addict I am.

Since 2002 I have been trying to low carb. I had great intentions. I have amazing will power. And it did. Not. Work. It worked for a day, or a week, but eventually I would fall prey to the "just one bite won't hurt me" and then I started the bloodsugar rollarcoaster again.

I can't even describe how horrible I feel typing this. It's like admitting that I have some ingrained horrible character flaw. The one everyone assumes all fat people have.

So I tried. And I failed. I failed over and over again. Finally I told my fiance that I couldn't do it, because it was constant temptation having all the crap in the house.

And he loves me, so he hugged me and he dried off my tears and he threw everything that wasn't induction-friendly away and told me he could do to loose a few pounds, too. And you know what? I've had a week of perfect health, perfect eating, and fabulous weight loss. I don't think it's a coincidence.

Do I expect him to do this forever? I'd hope so, because he has diabetes in his family, and I have diabetes in my family, and I'm not raising diabetic kids with my problems. But if he wants to go out and eat McDonalds and fries and candy bars... he's more than welcome to. And once I get better, I'm sure I'll be able to have it in the house without worrying. But now I need his help--and he is giving it to me.

Maybe I'm selfish, but I'm really tired of weighing this much and failing no matter how hard I try.

I agree that support is vital, although the major reason I stuck with this is anti-support. My mother told me I shouldn't waste my money on the book and food and joining Curves because I never stick with anything. So the first three months, which were the hardest for me, I just kept saying, "I will show her, I CAN do this" and I got through the hardest part because I was mad.

Then I decided that I couldn't be mad and I needed her support, as well as my husband (Fiance at the time) and they both offered it. they saw that I was serious and they have been wonderful.

My husband has lately been a little less supportive because he is craving potatoes and rice, I just don't make them any more.

So last night, I bucked up and made rice-a-roni for supper. I made one package, with the steak I was making. I gave it all to my husband and my son, and I took the largest steak. It worked for him. he was happy I had made it, I didn't even feel tempted to try it, and now I can probably go two or three weeks before he will whine again.

But all in all, he is my major support. I don't think I could do it without him telling me I can, that and the people on the TDC.

It kinda sucks without support in your household. I have a husband that needs to LC and 2 kids. Today, we had to make treats for an Easter party at my daughters school. Everyone else was fighting over the jellybeans while mommy just continued wrapping them. Tonight I had a steak and greenbeans. I did not even miss the baked potato. (even when I looked at dear husbands)I have been kinda craving again as I watch them eat Easter chocolate. mmmm Gold Brick Eggs mmmm But, I have an Endulge and pretend. :rolleyes: Anyway, it would be really nice if he would LC with me.

I think Easter is the easiest Holiday....I love boiled eggs, and they are everywhere. Plus, I can make deviled eggs, and they always have cool colors bled through the shell. LOL

What she said! :)

Expressed my view perfectly.

Now, some others have expressed that at least for a while, they couldn't deal with having the food in the house at all. I would hope that if I needed that level of support my family would be there, but frankly I doubt it. But I think they should be, if only for a little while till I got my cravings under control.

Valerie

I have to be in control of myself in facing any obstacles that come along. What other people do is out of my control so it really doesn't matter whether they support me or not.

I'd like to think family should also be supportive, but it's not always reality. I haven't even told my mum yet. Some day, but I know the support won't be there, so it's just not worth it right now.

My son is vegan and my daughter is vegetarian (don't know how that happened :lol: ). My daughter is much more supportive. She sees the big picture, just wants me to be healthy. My son is dead set against eating meat on principle. We have agreed to disagree. He just avoids the kitchen basically when the meat is sizzling, poor boy. But he knows that I support his choices, so that turned it for him.

Quote:

I am lucky enough to have a good friend following the same path, so it is much easier for me.

Hey teresamay! We get a lot of support from each other! :sunny:

What I'm saying I guess, is that I shouldn't expect it, but I sure appreciate when I do get it.

At this point in my life, food in the house would not be an issue for me although there is really not much here that I can't eat. I've banished the idea of ever eating sugar again and there is chocolate in my socks drawer that's been there since Christmas. I guess I will give it to someone for Easter. At work, everyone is used to me smelling the treats and then walking away -- and they seem to be disappointed if I don't -- hey Louise these doughnuts sure smell good!

But that's me and that's today.

The most important support for me is recognizing my weight loss, respecting what I choose to eat or not to eat and buying me new clothes! ;)

I'll be honest, I need the support. I didn't eliminate all the carbs in the house. I just make my husband cook them if he wants them that bad, and when I'm not around (certain craving items). And I don't allow potato chips in the house. We have a rule he who cook decides what will be served no complaining or *itching. You can eat or not. No tempting off the diet and no bad mouthing the diet. My husband is hard to deal with. He honestly doesn't care if I gain weight or lose it. He loves me anyways. Which is all I need really.

I need support. But I feel it is my responsibility in the end. Too many, I have personally known (me included) have found on the days the "family" does something off program that we use it as an excuse to go off program too. Then blame it on "them".

Nah...it is up to me. I got where I WAS (476 pounds) by making bad choices for me. I got where I AM (80+ pounds lighter) by making better choices for me.

But as those who have been around have heard from me before...your mileage may vary, I speak only for me and from my experience, and I will screw up again. I will also pick my butt back up again and get back on the health train. Woo! Woo! There is no end to my health journey 'til that last clocking out when God tells me my shift is up. But you know what? Where during parts of this "diet", that was kinda depressing now it gives me great joy. This eating program I am on is a way of life now and not a diet. I do have things off program. Just fewer and fwer as the months go by and this becomes easier and easier to enjoy.

So...though my family support has declined over the past 10 months from their initial excitement for me, my own understanding is now that if I am going to do this I am the only one responsible for ME.

After the first week, the things that other people ate didn't bother me. My dh is supportive, but he and ds continue to eat carbs. I abdicated from the cooking role, and that helps so much. However, if there were baked goods around all the time, I would cave, cause I'm a junkie too. I can't have sugar. I just can't. Now that I realize that, I can move on.

I am the weakest person you'll ever meet as far as willpower goes, and I quit buying the stuff that I like, but I do buy them SOME of the stuff they like. But really no sweets because it doesn't matter what it is, if it's sugar, I'll eat it.
They understand, and have made accomodations like buying candy at work/school and eating it there. It wasn't like I asked them or talked to them about it, it just sort of happened. Saves a TON on groceries too without buying all the junk.
I'm really glad my kids are mostly grown because I used to go all out for holidays.
So I don't think they should change their eating habits to accomodate my woe, but they have. :)