why so much talk of cheating?
 

I don't get it. It's like every other thread is about cheating.

Sorry- I don't mean to offend anyone, but am I the only one tired of hearing about cheating all the time?

Its OK Salt...
Some folk's need the help, and think about cheating too much...and it makes em feel better to talk about it, I suppose. Better to talk about it for them, then to actually do it! :agree:

It is so very hard to lose weight, and the "pressure" of wanting that damn scale to move in a favorable direction can become just too much at times...so folk's lose stride and talk about cheating, cheat days, etc...
Lets just all lose our damn weight and get on with it! LOL!

Best wishes!
Happy Jake

The only time it really bothers me is when someone cheats fairly regularly, once a week or even once a day, then gets extreamly upset and state they are in a stall because they havn't lost everyday and it's all the fault of the eating plan.

I don't think there is such a thing as cheating, I think there are good and bad choices. As with everything else in life we will make some bad choices now and then, but the trick is to get right back up and on track. If you are craving something over and over and end up having it (say pizza) then don't stress over it...you won't gain back what you've lost, it may slow you a little but you will get to where you are going and you may find the trip a little easier when you aren't so strict and hard on yourself.

Just my opinion, I could be wrong.

Suzan

i,m with you suzan
the problem with being on a diet(any diet) is that some foods are not really allowed.i think its human nature to want what you can,t have.i try and do it with treats, not cheats.
twice a week i allow myself a LEGAL treat-in my case peanut butter or a l-c cheesecake and then just get back on track.it doesn,t always work but it usually stops me wanting anything high carb.it also gives a bit of a break from the foods i eat normally .there are so many good l-c recipes on this site that i need never go over to the "other side"

christine

Quit reading the posts
 

I've been on here a couple of months and I only just realized if you mouse-over the topic, you get a preview. Don't check the ones about cheating if it bothers you.

My own opinion is that the very notion of "cheating" indicates a lack of commitment, but no-one's asking for my opinion. Except maybe you.

REAL addicts don't talk about "cheating;" they talk about death and incarceration when they fall off their recovery. Think heroin, cocaine, etc. People quitting smoking mostly understand that if they cheat, they are NOT quitting smoking. Alcoholics who are serious about recovery don't think they can "cheat" and get away with it; when they cheat, they find themselves getting cut out of cars at the base of a tree.

So I listen to these foodies and kinda chuckle. It's simply easier (at least, it is for me) to put those high-carb foods in the same category as cigarettes. They were enjoyable when I smoked, but they were killing me, and I chose not to go back there.

But I have to admit, the more I read these boards, the more amazed I am at the varieties of experience we bring to our attempts at weight loss. Truly awesome. And whatever works...

I can honestly say I haven't cheated at all since I started. Don't get me wrong here, I have wanted to, but the thought of starting over is just too much for me to give up!! :agree:

:lol: :lol:


YOU SAID IT BEST JAKE ! LOL :lol: :lol:

I agree Jun
 

After the first week of induction and carbohydrate withdrawels.. I havent had the urge to cheat either.. I've had the urge to want something sweet but settle for something that I can have.. such as an Atkins breakfast bar.. sometimes I just cut it in half and nibble on that, just to take the urge away or make some jello or another low carb recipie.. The withdrawels on carbohydrates is harder then when I quit smoking a year ago.. lol ..

also.. I dont think of this as a diet really.. I think of it as a new way of eating or a lifetime eating plan..

when you say "diet" you automatically think of when I get off this "diet" I can have this or that.. and have what you want. its so much easier to just take one day at a time and perhaps make that recipie low carb..and.. if you feel you really need to..just do it and get right back on program..and forgive yourself and go on..

Same here. No going back for me. After almost six months I can't even think of an illegal food I would like to have....

Alina

why people cheat
 

There are probably several reasons why people post about cheating on here. And many many people cheat. For what reasons?

People cheat because this WOE is so different from what we've been eating all our lives. We're used to having starchy and sugary substances, both "good" foods and "junk" foods. Our minds are programmed for habit. When we break that habit, our tendencies are to keep wanting to do whatever the habit is, and fighting that tendency sometimes preoccupies people. (There's probably not one person here who hasn't "cheated" in some way or another on this WOE.) So they decide to cheat or not to cheat. That's their personal decision. But some people maybe need help making that decision. That's when they post, hoping others will make the decision for them. Or, they have already cheated, feel bad about it, and want either to be told "you'll be ok, just get back on plan" or to be told "naughty naughty." These people are really dedicated to this WOE, but are having a tough time with it, for whatever reason. They want to stay on plan, and use posting as a tool to help.

Some people cheat just because they haven't yet made the committment to this WOE. They cheat, and then use it as an excuse for not really following this WOE. These people aren't losing weight, and they're griping about it. Most of these people probably aren't on this board. A few are. We support them and hopefully they will finally realize that the answer to their weight problem is this WOE. These people will cheat on any diet they choose. They want to lose weight, but don't want any effort to do so. No sticking to a good diet and no exercise. These are the people who want to take a magic pill and have the weight disappear overnight. These people want to shift the blame for their lack of weight loss somewhere besides themselves. (It's the cravings, it's the food I have to keep around for other family members, it's the temptations at work, it's the travel I have to do, etc.) And they'll keep doing this until they decide to change their thinking and their actions. It's not these other things. It's them.

As I mentioned, there probably aren't too many people who fall into the second category on this board. If they don't take the effort to really try and lose weight it is doubtful that they would take the effort to belong to something like this. To the few people on this board who do fall into this category, good for you for joining this board. I hope that you will soon come to realize that you can't keep blaming others for your lack of motivation. Please stay on this board, but don't use it to shift blame. Use it to make the decision to finally do what you need to do.

Just my 2 cents worth.

Joan

A Natural Thing to Do
 

:nono:On any diet, people have "cheated" to satisfy some craving and have some psuedo-understanding in their minds that it won't hurt. It's like telling someone to not think of pink elephants--what's the first thing that comes to mind....those damn elephants!

We must also try to understand that a good number of obese/overweight people aren't that way because they either want to be or eat entirely too much food, it's a psychological process which either protects them from past hurts (i.e., insulating one's self from pain) or feelings of inadequacy.

I am no expert, but it's hard to commit to something that is out of the ordinary. Some people do not have that yet and some may get it and some won't. We know what results to expect and if those results aren't as expected, we modify our program to attain the desired results.

The only cure for this "cheating" is to know that a level of committment has not been reached, they have and will "cheat" on any diet, and will probably continue doing so. We can only encourage as much as we can, and hopefully know when to let go (could turn into nagging, hence, more cheating) and most importantly, take care of ourselves.:agree:

______________________________________________
:angel: Your arms are too short to box with God!

Tehn you also have to consider when pl talk about foods that they thought would be ok to eat but turns out its not. Thats valuable information IMO. But thats more of an accidental cheating

well like I said, I don't understand it. this WOL is so satisfying - I eat all I want (which isn't a lot bec the types of foods we eat make me full fast) and I don't get hungry. I don't get cravings, feel bloated or lethargic. I don't know why people would plan a cheat.

I know there are temptations and/or mistakes and when one is overcome by that, sure it's nice to have a pat on the back from someone to say, 'it's ok, look to tomorrow'. that's fine. we ALL learn from that, and probably, reading those posts has kept me from straying off the path.

I think it's the planned cheats, or the people who give in to tempations too often without learning from the last time, and then complain they're stalling - those posts bug me.

It's so simple - you cheat, you will not lose weight.

i promise i don't mean to sound snippey, saltnpeppa, but this is "low-Carb Diets Forums & Support . it can be difficult to be supported when people don't know your "failings" or mishaps. it's often difficult to have a non-low-carb advocate understand and support someone who is devastated for consuming a slice of toast with jelly, and a glass of milk. but here, it makes sense to us.
cs_carver has a great point- just let your mouse hover over each thread before you enter- and you'll be able to avoid most of them. good luck and happy hassle-free low-carbing. :)

Now Hold Up A Sec
 

:exclm:Saccacrine, wow! on your 19+ weight loss since just this June! You must tell me your secret.

:nono: Now, on a little somber note:

Quote:

...it can be difficult to be supported when people don't know your "failings" or mishaps. it's often difficult to have a non-low-carb advocate understand and support someone who is devastated for consuming a slice of toast with jelly,

Me thinks you made a mistake if you were referring to us as "Non-Low-Carbers" isn't that a mistake? Anyone who has voiced an opinon about the "cheaters" are low carb advocates. THIS IS a low carb site. Did you get confused? If so, it's cool. You mentioned the "cheater's" devastation following the consumption of a restricted food and we should understand this? I beg to differ (politely) that they know that a piece of regular toast and a glass of milk is NOT a part of this lifestyle, so why do it? (you may refer to my previous reply). Please don't tell me it's snowing if I have dandruff on my collar.

The bottom line is they KNOW this is low carb, yet as I stated previously, people cheat for various reasons and some just get a kick out of playing "victim" role. "Look how you made me feel" or "Now you're being judgmental of me." If you know anything about shame-based behaviors, then you would be able to see some reason.:roll:

It's just too tiring trying to understand practiced mistakes.:doah:

I know I can avoid the posts about cheating, and I DO. I could avoid the whole site, but IMO it would be your guys' loss. The posts about cheating have increased dramatically, to the point, where I (and I feel I'm a good community member who helps people where I can) don't enjoy visiting anymore. I wanted to know if others felt the same way, and if there's a solution.

After all, this is not the "low carb CHEATER'S forum". My understanding is that this is the place for people following this way of life.

Just like if you are alcoholic, you don't go to an AA meeting or web-forum and say, I'm planning to go out and get wasted next Tuesday and then asking 'hmm think that's ok??'.

They don't tolerate that. (and the implied question is should we?)

The point is not about those who make mistakes and don't have anyone to support them for having toast with jelly and milk (but umm.. didn't they read anything about being LC first?.. but let's assume, still, it was a mistake..). I 'm talking about people who plan cheats and post that they are planning to cheat on X day or binge on Z day and then want support.

I can see why people try all this supposed cheating and since we live in a quick fix society it`s bound to come up.You have to think for yourselves and determine what is appropriate for you....

oh- linda- i think i misspoke. what i meant to say was that non-lo-carbers (family memebers or friends) - people outSIDE of this community, were probably less capable of understanding mentionings of "cheating," whereas within this community, it is understood, acceptable, and therefore a great outlet which is (and often should be, IMHO) used.
sorry for the confusion. :)

ps, thanks for the weight comment. lets me know im doing good. :)

You should go read the Love & Marriage forums. :lol:

Sam

smchan: Good weight loss there. Let me get this straight, 6/03 you were 253lbs. and 7/19 you were 224lbs. My goodness, that's 29lbs. in less than a month! Way to Go! What are ya, some kinda test-tube baby? :) That's pretty awesome.

I guess there is a lot of talk about cheating because a lot of people have problems with it. It isn't all about willpower or wanting attention or just not being commited enough. God! those sound like all the nasty things I hear skinny people say about fat people all the time behind their backs. I am surprised to hear it in here...

Alot of good opinions have been posted in this thread.
I agree that those who do cheat, do need to come here for support, what I don't agree with is Coddling those same people over and over again, at some point they have to realize they are not doing the diet/woe.
I also don't beleive that while giving support, sugar coating the problem is the right way to do it. After all the support is meant to be something to keep you on this way of eating, not helping one to justify what they have done.

Hope that makes sense.

Cheers Kathy

I think that everyone's experience with any "diet" is different, and there can be many triggers that set people off...that being said...this is a support forum...I can understand that if it is someone that does the "cheat regularily" it can perhaps be hard to be supportive, but then we don't have to answer every post we see do we.
Also, I am not sure that I can say that they are not commintted to this way of life...or WOE....sometimes we eat without knowing that we are eating...after all, we all wouldn't be here if we "behaved" ourselves, or weren't a little self indulgent for most of our lives.
And as for all the other addictions mentioned...you never have to put those things in your body...but we all HAVE to put food in our bodies...I myself have found it much easier to quit smoking after 20 some years, than any diet I have ever been on. If I could quit food the same way, it would be a breeze, but everyday, you put food in your mouth...and perhaps it makes others need or want other food...hard to say....
Anyway, just my take on the subject

More like 6 weeks (first of June thru mid-July) but who's counting? :)

I've also gone from 42 waist jeans to 38 and XXL shirt to XL.

Sam

well said kathy!

I certainly understand the need for support but I do agree with Saltnpeppa that it can get old hearing about it all the time. Especially from the same people. I do think there's a danger of making cheating seem acceptable and that doesn't help anyone.

But one request I would make is that the 'cheater' not go into all the details of the food. I know that when I'm trying really hard to eat clean, it's tough to read about people cheating, especially when they give all the details. It can start me craving just reading about all these goodies.

Amy

Pick and Choose...
 

Personally, I take comfort from the idea others aren't perfect, and have their weak moments, too. In fact, reading about how sick someone got, or cheating and stalling is actually a reminder to me to NOT go there myself! (Man, that sounds selfish, but..)

I tend to skip threads that pertain to things that don't interest me. My least favorite posts are by people you suspect haven't done a bit of reading, and expect the moderators to basically provide ALL the information FOR them. (And to the moderators.. you have much more patience than I :angel: )

I just wish I'd found these boards a LONG time ago!

re: reading descriptions of cheating foods

I only went to one OA meeting, but I learned there that they don't let you mention the foods that will push you over. They may be trigger foods for other people as well.

I've had a hard week the last week, but I tried to confine my issues to the Confession Booth. I'm a little embarrassed about my postings there, but somehow "telling" others made me feel more accountable. And just "get over it" and "get on with it". I was proud (before this week) that my "cheats" were allowing myself a cup of coffee a day, and a diet pepsi every couple days.

I love this new WOE, and I'm about to celebrate 8 weeks (and should change my current weight - cause it's lower). I get so much out of this forum and these threads, that I want to give back in ways that are helpful (or at least not harmful). This thread has been enlightening.

Sarah